Adventures of a Canadian Victorianist

What A Long Strange Trip It's Been

2006-11-13T07:12:00.000Z

Well folks, after way more deliberation than the subject deserves, I've decided to say farewell to Jane Eyre in Brighton. While I am still Jane at heart, I am no longer in Brighton and my day to day life doesn't provide quite as much interesting material as living in a foreign country did.

The good news is that I'm starting a new blog which will be different, hopefully in a good personal-growth sort of way. My hope is that it will keep my writing skills sharp and perhaps I can slip some politics and poetry in. While I completely understand that this doesn't sound like a barrel of monkeys and isn't everyone's thing, I hope some of you will visit me at http://writtenonthebody.wordpress.com/

Thanks to all for your support and readership over the last year. It was appreciated.

I leave you with one of my favorite poems by the wonderful Emily Dickinson:

This is my letter to the World
That never wrote to Me-
The simple news that Nature told-
With tender Majesty

Her Message is committed
To Hands I cannot see-
For love of Her- Sweet- countrymen-
Judge tenderly- of Me

Better late than never?

2006-10-04T19:14:00.000+01:00

It's a little embarrassing to write a post that is so overdue, but I do have a good excuse, my laptop was MIA for a few weeks and then we couldn't get it online. Upon my return I was also mostly in habitation mode in attempt to readjust to being back. After a week of reading Thomas Hardy and playing with the cat I then felt ready to re-enter the world. I'm still getting used to being back- I don't think it's sunk in yet that I'm not going back to England. Or that my dissertation is finished. I need someone to give me an essay topic. Even just a reading list!
I start work in the real world on Monday and am looking forward to it, though I think the 40 hour work week will be a bit of an adjustment.

So I promised updates about the trip, and I had intentions of presenting a well organized travel journal, however my journal writing became more irregular and rambling as the trip went on and now I'm honestly too lazy to make sense of scribbled phrases like "weather forecast!" and "the creativity of pub food..."

But for a summation (without pictures, as Blogger still seems to be making my life difficult), my first stop was Haworth, a beautiful town in the middle of no where that took me a day to get to. I was thankful to have my Elizabeth Gaskell novel with me. I sprung for a bed and breakfast, which turned out to be owned by a guy who could have been a British version of my Uncle Bob. Haworth was by far the most stunning place I had been to in the UK, and being a city girl it felt like I had stepped into a Disney movie. I wandered amongst sheep, horses, chickens and cats and managed not to break into song. I did, however, try to make friends with some sheep who in turn looked freaked out and avoided me. My assurances that I was a vegetarian didn't seem to help, as the fact that I was talking to them seemed to make the situation more worrying. Anyway, the town has milked its Bronte heritage of all its worth and there was nothing you couldn't buy with a Bronte face on it. The Bronte parsonage, where the family lived, has resisted too much commercialization and was well preserved. It was run by the Bronte Society, which is just scholarly enough to prevent Haworth from being a big Bronte shop.
But the best part was the countryside around the town, with the wide open rolling hills and thin rolling fog it was hard not to feel inspired. On my last day I walked up to Wuthering Heights in the rain and allowed myself to feel rather angsty. The air was full of so much energy, it was overwhelming.

The next day I headed back down to Gatwick to meet my sister, who was apparently arriving the day after, so I spent 12 hours longer in an airport than I needed to. Anyway, 12 hours later Julia arrived and we went back to our hostel so she could sleep. We did some shopping in near-by second hand shops, and the next day we went to Camden market, which is full of the coolest useless merchandise I've even seen but also the worst place in London to drag a giant suitcase around. We also went to the British Museum, which somehow in my year of being in England I had never visited. The Egyptian and Greek/Roman collection was amazing.

On Sept 11 we were in Scotland, having took the longest train ride ever that almost drove us insane with boredom. Edinburgh was breathtaking at first sight, the architecture of the city is so fantastic you hardly know where to point your camera. We did all the trouristy things, including the gigantic castle and the National Gallery. The best part of the castle was going into the dungeons, which included shared bathrooms and bunkbeds, on which my sister observed "it's just like a hostel!"

I would have to say the highlites were the Whiskey Experience (I can love anything that begins with "let's take a trip back in time...") and the ghost walk which took us underneath the city in a series of vaults, and when told they were haunted few people disagreed. The Writer's Museum was also interesting, being spread out through someone's house and containing lots of information about Robert Louis Stevenson and Robert Burns, among others. Sadly even Robbie's oddly lyrical Address to a Haggis didn't convince either of us to try the dish.
Around this time we discovered a passport had gone missing and we had to cut our travels short to make a very urgent and very expensive trip down to London to get to the Canadian Consulate before we left to country. In the end everything worked out, but we were so broke and tired we were looking forward to the plane ride home where we could get two full meals and sit in cushy seats. Nine hours and three viewings of Failure to Launch and X-men 3 later we were back on Canadian soil and eager to do laundry.

Pictures will be up on Flickr asap so you can have some visuals.

Several people have asked me "so how was England?" and I'm still trying to sort out the answer. It's a bit like being asked to cram a years worth of experiences into a few words. Mostly I just have to say it was overwhelming. But for the time being I'm home, and home is always the best destination.

road's end

2006-09-16T17:17:00.000+01:00

Hi folks. This is a minimalist post to let you all know I'm still alive and on my way back home on Monday. I've spent more time in the Canadian Embassy than I ever hope to again. Further explanations and travel stories to come.
See all of you (or at least most of you, I assume- I actually have no idea who reads this blog) soon!

Seriously guys, whose got the smelling salts

2006-08-29T15:30:00.000+01:00

So I found out today from the "Assessment handbook for postgraduate students", that I was supposed to receive in the mail but certainly never did, that I have to write a summary, and an introduction and a preface for my dissertation. As if the fact that I already have 2000 words too many wasn't already enough of a problem. £"%%^!!$*!

Pre-deadline chest pains are becoming frequent. Why am I doing this again?

Untitled

2006-08-26T12:11:00.000+01:00

Hi folks. Not much time for an extensive entry today. I took a day trip with Sarah yesterday to the beautiful town of Arundel, home to Arundel Castle. It was an amazing trip, the castle took my breath away. It even had a gigantic garden complete with a hedge maze and mysterious fruit, taking me back to the days of reading The Secret Garden over and over.
The inside of the castle was huge and packed full of artifacts from various centuries, all of which were unlabeled so we used our imaginations.
More pictures are up on Flickr.
The thesis is coming along, I'm pretty much finished writing, except for the sections I left ellipsis after because I didn't know how to finish them. I'm not sure how my supervisor would feel about me putting "to be continued" at the end of chapters.
So sleepy. Must drink more tea...

I'd marry you for your money in a minute

2006-08-19T21:05:00.000+01:00

Hi folks. Today was a day well suited to staying in bed drinking tea and reading, alas I am not a middle class Victorian woman so I had to get up and be productive. To compensate for my disappointment at not being able to go to Amsterdam, I took a trip to Cambridge yesterday, it being one of the few places I've wanted to visit but haven't had the chance yet. The weather wasn't on my side, for the first time in months it was chilly outside and I of course didn't bring a coat, and as it tends to do when I go on a trip, it rained. But my spirits would not be dampened (ha ha dampened). The train ride was long so when I got there I just bought a ticket for the hop-on-hop off tourist bus, which proved to be a huge rip off because the city was small enough to just walk around in. I stopped off to view some punting and then wandered around the city, and tried to find all the colleges. The most impressive was Christ's College, being visually overwhelming and also had the most beautiful chapel attached to it. Alumni include John Milton and Charles Darwin, nothing to sneeze at. Trinity Hall was also really interesting, with a mini King Henry guarding the gates. I think Stephen Hawking went there. I passed by Cambridge University Press, and inside found myself surrounded by books I could never afford. I nervously tried my best to look and not touch, then went to find some secondhand shops. I bought a copy of the True History of the Kelly Gang by Peter Carey* and then totally by accident stumbled upon an open air market in the centre of the city. It had a really non-commercial feel about it, I bought some croissants and postcards. Cambridge was less obviously a University town than "that other place" (being Oxford) and I have to say didn't have the same historical charm. There weren't as many old buildings and more chain stores that are in every British city. The fact that women were not granted degrees at Cambridge until 1947 also explained a few things. There was definitely a conservative feel to the city. Though Wikipedia tells more both Germaine Greer and Sylvia Plath graduated from Newnham College, one of the colleges I couldn't find in my wanderings.
I arrived home cold and ready for bed, so I pretty much just went to bed. Today I've done some editing on my introduction, despite not having finished the last chapter or conclusion. Still waiting for inspiration. This evening Emily, Jill and I watched Breakfast at Tiffany's which will always be one of my favorite movies. I'm a sucker for talented feline acting. And what ever happened to George Peppard?
I have to start packing soon. Yikes! If anyone feels like calling me and telling me to get my crap together it would be really appreciated. I'm usually self motivated but I appear to be drifting this month.

* I'm about half way through this book and it's spectacular, really interesting to read after Isabelle Allende's Zorro. And I just discovered Carey's been nominated for the Booker again. Doesn't that make it three times? Though I think my vote's with Sarah Waters (because my opinion is so important to the Booker judges).

How terrorism ruined my weekend

2006-08-11T11:12:00.000+01:00

I woke up this morning to a frantic phone call from Kristin reporting that our flight to Amsterdam has been cancelled, due to the rather scary events going on in UK airports. It seems they cancelled all the smaller flights and left the more expensive ones running, which it totally not fair. Sigh. Now I'm going to have to do work this weekend. My work regime hasn't been so good this week, I'm on my last chapter so I feel like it's my last chance to say everything I need to. I'm having a hard time keeping my writing as snappy as it was in the beginning when I was bursting with energy and ideas. There is not much bursting going on anymore. But yesterday I did get a hold of an academic in Australia who's working on a biography of Kingsford, and he offered to answer any questions I had. I hope he means it! This also means I have someone to thank in my acknowledgements besides my absent supervisor.

Some highlites of the last week:

- Gay pride day on Saturday. The parade went right by my window, and I didn't think to get my camera in time to get any good pictures, book it looks like Julia and Melissa have some good ones if you're interested. There were lots of costumes, and, well costumes. It was all really fun, however it gave me some misgivings about how commercialized Pride days have become- they used to be much more of a political statement. But this is just me being the humourless liberal I am. I spent the day with Kristin and her flatmates, mostly sitting on the beach being taught for hours how to juggle. Still can't do it.
- Breakfast on the beach with flatmates. Apparently there's a cafe that does cheap breakfast right across from our building. Milkshakes for a pound! What more could you ask for.
- Buying train tickets for my travels in September. I love planning trips- in fact I think I may add travel guide to my list of back-up careers. We managed to book some cheap hostels, too, all with breakfast included. I hope everything's ok with the airport situation and my sister flying over.
- I found an entry in Edward Carpenter's journals in which he comments after being at one of AK's lectures: "We poor little mortals must be grateful for what illuminations we can get, however quaint or queer the mediating personalities may be. " Poor mild mannered Edward.

Well, that's about all the interesting stuff.
5000 words to go!

Officially the cutest cat... ever.

2006-08-06T15:09:00.000+01:00

Usually I make fun of people who use their cats as photography models, but I can make an exception for Hadley.

T-1 month and counting

2006-08-03T11:44:00.000+01:00

Wow it's August. One month to go. I'm trying not to think about it too much! Since my last day at work on Monday I've had a fairly productive week, now that I can just focus on my thesis. On Monday I took a trip up to London for the purposes of visiting the British Library newspapers building, which was in the middle of nowhere and cost me a three pound tube ride. Yeesh. Anyway, it was productive and the building was really beautiful. I got to look at a periodical Kingsford edited for one year, and noted how it went from a journal about fashion and domestic arts to a magazine about suffrage and animal rights over about a month. Unfortunately it didn't last very long, as Anna refused to allow advertising and went bankrupt. I would have liked to read more about bloomers and bicycles. Anyway, Sarah had mentioned she was coming back from a trip and would be in London on same day, but her train didn't come in until 8:30, so I had three hours to kill in the evening when all the interesting stuff was closed. I ended up wandering around Bloomsbury and popping in and out of various bookshops. I got some truly horrible Chinese take out and sat in a park to write up some of the research I'd pilfered. I met Sarah and we took the train back together, which was good because it turned out to be an incredibly long ride. By the time we got to a pub in Brighton we only made it through one pint before we were both overcome with fatigue from our long day, so I stumbled home and slept way too late. Thus ended my London day.
I found out some good news this week- my sister is flying back to England in September to accompany me while a traipse around the country! It'll be great not to have to travel by myself. The jury is still out on where we want to go, I'm going to go up to Haworth for a few days by myself first, because most people would find it boring (but there's sheep and moors!). I'll hopefully spend time doing some writing and probably reading Jane Eyre for the hundredth time. It took me a long time to figure out how to take the train up there, I think I'll have to change over three times after I get to London. Before I leave Sarah's going to let me sleep on her couch for two nights, so we can have time to celebrate and I can say goodbye to everyone. More goodbyes- dammit.
Yesterday I went up to campus and looked at some past MA dissertations, mostly to compare how long their bibliography was and how they titled their chapters, silly things like that. It's hard to make any other comparisons as my topic is so different from anything any one's done in the last decade. The 1970's seemed to be a good decade for studying Victorian spirituality at Sussex- once again confirming I was born in the wrong decade. I took some books out that I don't think will be all that helpful, because the books I really wanted were of course not there. Where could Edward Carpenter's autobiography be hiding, seriously. I saw some people I knew in the graduate centre and we went out for a beer, then came home to do some more writing. the movie Outbreak was on TV last night, involving monkeys, a virus and Dustin Hoffmann. Now it's the next morning and I am off to the public library to look at travel guides, and am determined to finish my chapter today. I'm at 13000 words, which might mean my conclusion will be something like "thanks for reading my dissertation and now here's my bibliography", but we'll see. I'm just trying to get words down for now.
Wish me luck!

What ever happened to smelling salts? They seem practical...

2006-07-27T18:44:00.000+01:00

Alright, a serious post this time, I promise.
Good news- we got our water back last week and it appears the Housing Office is going to give us some kind of compensation, which hopefully won't come in the form of gift certificates or something. I really have a new found appreciation of running water, it's a luxury I never really gave a second thought to before but living without it is hard.
I'm done teaching next Monday, and though the kids are growing more and more out of control as their departure date approaches and they know they can escape our clutches, I am going to miss them a little. Two of them told me today I was their favorite teacher. *sniff* Of course, it's possible they said that to all of us. I got my picture taken about 42 times. Tomorrow is their final test, and then we're going to show them Yellow Submarine on Monday (as a movie relevant to British culture and also easy to understand).
Today I was up at campus and discovered a great book that I had somehow missed the entire year. I also tracked down the short review Oscar Wilde did of AK's book (he thought it was so-so, if you were curious). His Mom was a big follower of Kingsford.
Yesterday I went out to the pub with the English dept. crowd and it was so good to see everybody, it made me sad when I had to uncharacteristically leave before midnight because of my early morning. They were shocked to see me leave after one pint, which made me feel a little like an alcoholic. I say, when in Rome...
Last week I saw Pirates of the Caribbean with Julia and though I hadn't seen the first one, I thoroughly enjoyed it, excepting the giant octopus thing. Not a big fan of tentacles. I have to say, Orlando kind of annoyed me as a fairy (sorry, elf) in LOTR, but the pirate thing really works for me. Yarrr.
The thesis continues to grow slowly as I continue to do more reading when I should be writing. I emailed my supervisor a chapter, but I suspect she'll get back to me around the time of my submission date, so in other words I'm not holding my breath. I miss my undergraduate supervisor- I think she read like three drafts before my deadline. She probably just enjoyed pointing out my bad grammar.
The heat continues to be a convenient excuse not to work and I sunburned my face yesterday, which made it hurt to smile for a while. Sunscreen from now on. Anybody have any suggestions for beating the heat? I have already considered the "men waving palm leaves" method, but seems a little expensive.

Smelling salts! I need the smelling salts!

2006-07-21T19:20:00.000+01:00

First Margaret Atwood comes to WordFest and now Ani DiFranco is coming to Folk Festival. What next? John Lennon is found to have been hiding in Calgary for 26 years? Oh, the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune....

Hot (English Teacher) in the City

2006-07-19T12:46:00.000+01:00

Hello folks. I've had a hell of a week, but the details aren't really all that interesting. No international intrigue or action packed stories. The first not-interesting problem is that our flat has been without water for two weeks now and our building manager doesn't seem to be in much of a hurry to get us a new water tank. So we have to shower, use the toilet, and wash our dishes in the flat next door. It feels a little like camping, which I enjoy, but not when it's involuntary. Anyway, because it's so damn hot here the whole situation is getting slightly unsanitary so city bylaws might have to get involved, which means emails and phone calls and filling out forms. We all know how much I love bureaucracy.
The maximum temperature predicted today was 35. 35! Too hot to focus on work, too hot to eat, too hot to wear clothes. Definitely too hot to be teaching a bunch of mouthy Spanish teenagers. Though I have to admit the teaching thing is growing on me a bit, I've come up with some damn creative vocabulary games, including a very competitive match of hangman. And there's only a week and a half left. But all the work I've had to put into making lesson plans for this job has meant less time to work on the thesis, even though my recreational activities haven't seemed to be effected. Funny how that works. But seriously, I'm only up like 1000 words over the last week. Not good. I have to get into write-my-ass-off mode.
Add on top of this some disturbing news about my father and I'm ready to crawl under the blankets (with a bag of ice cubes) and not come out until September.
On the upside, I have the best tan I've had in years and the view from my window is more breaktaking than ever. Minus the half naked throngs of beach-goers. Also, Kristen and I are planning a trip to Amsterdam next month, just for a weekend, so more details to come.

Adios.

A new favorite web comic

2006-07-13T15:33:00.000+01:00

courtesy of Married to the Sea

Some of you may be wondering "Does Jen actually do any work?" to which I have no answer at the present time.

It's just another manic Monday

2006-07-09T22:22:00.000+01:00

Hello all. I've had a slow sleepy weekend. How you people do it with your 9-5 jobs I will never know. The last week had its stressful moments, many of which involved being lost in the rain on my new bike with brakes that didn't work properly. I was given the wrong address twice for my first day on the job, but I found my way there on Thursday and got a feel for the kids and what I'd be teaching. Basically it's my job to teach vocabulary to three sets of Spanish teenagers with varying degrees of English capabilities. The set up is a little strange because we don't mark or evaluate anything they do, so they don't have much motivation for learning anything, which makes things tough. And we're not given any sort of resources, like photocopying and whatnot, so I foresee my lessons being less attention grabbing than one would hope. But I like it, it's a change to be the one standing on front of the class. Definitely a different perspective.
I'm still feeling overwhelmed with my thesis work, to state the obvious it's such a big project. There's so much I want to say but because my subject matter is so... let's say unconventional (some would say weird), there's a lot of explaining and defining involved. I really like being able to dedicate all my time to this one project, though. I was always frustrated in my undergrad with the sort of schizophrenic learning process U of C was so fond of. But I have to be more disciplined- all I did this weekend was work on my bibliography (which counts in our word count- isn't that strange?).
So for the first time in years I am able to completely avoid the Stampede, I don't have to hear about it at all. And I know you're all thinking "but what about the little doughnuts?" to which I would inform you they sell them on the Pier and call them American Doughnuts. The best of both worlds.
Many of you have been asking about my future plans, which I usually respond to with the "deer-in-headlights" look, however I think unless I get offered a spectacular job in the next month I will travel for a few weeks upon finishing my degree, run out of money, and arrive back in Canada sometime around the middle of September. In time for the myriad of birthdays everyone has that month, though you might all be getting presents made from recycled and found objects.
I spent today reading On Beauty by Zadie Smith, this years winner of the Orange Prize, which is a pretty big deal over on this side of the pond. And it's freakin' amazing. It's one of those novels in which after you finish reading it the real world seems less interesting.
On that note, I have to go to bed now because I have to get up at 7. Blech. Getting up early makes me so whiney.

Other career options I am currently considering:

2006-07-04T16:27:00.000+01:00

1) Animal psychologist with my own call-in radio show (as a homage to the wonderful Jeanne Garofalo in The Truth About Cats and Dogs)

2) Gypsy

3) Seller of weird stuff found at garage sales and flea markets

4) Companion to someone rich who would like someone to talk about books with them. I can also do baton twirling.

5) Astronomer

6) Pilot

7) Palm Reader (could be combined with #2)

8) Beachcomber (ok, so I don't know exactly what that is)

9) Michaëlle Jean's protege (which might be difficult because she never returns my phone calls)

10) Professional list-maker

Any other suggestions are more than welcome. First person to find me an alternative to grad school gets a free palm-reading.

Existential angst and a bit of patriotism

2006-06-29T23:07:00.000+01:00

I've had a weird week, but it's only been weird in my mind so no one else need worry. I've begun to realize that I only really have two more months left here and feel like another chapter of my life is coming to and end. I've gotten attached to Brighton and the friends I've met here- the thought of having another round weepy goodbyes makes me feel like perhaps I should just stop making friends to avoid sad goodbyes in the future. It's also a little insane that I'll have a Master's degree in a little over two months (well, not officially, but minus all the red tape). Just between you and me I don't really feel qualified. I feel like I'm not ready to go, like I want to take more classes and hang out in student pubs for another year. I officially have eternal-student syndrome.
In more happier news, I like to give a shout out to the fabulous Mr Mehmel who I've heard directed a smashing play which is no surprise, and I'll always be sad to have missed!
Sarah and I briefly discussed how depressing it was that no one comes out and watches our theses in their final moments- perhaps we should start a new wave of performance literary criticism. Who wouldn't want to see an interpretive dance about late Victorian spiritual radicalism? Anybody? Didn't think so! Fortunately, we waived the idea as English students are all too defensive and introverted to unleash our work into the world, so it's best left to the theatre folks.
I've been perusing through jobs postings both in Canada and England and am discovering I am either under qualified or over qualified for everything. Having a Master's is like being in a professional borderland. So anyway I think I'll stop that activity for now as it gives me chest pains.
Today Kristen and I saw Thank You For Smoking, and though no one asked for it I'm going to give a personal recommendation as it was clever yet profound. And Aaron Eckhart has amazingly perfect hair. Is Al Gore's movie out yet in Canada? I'd really like to see it but it hasn't made it's way across the Atlantic.
So I need suggestions of how to celebrate Canada Day in a foreign country- beer? Hockey? America bashing? Oh, maybe face painting....

Heart of Gold

2006-06-23T10:54:00.000+01:00

It's a good day when Neil Young is first up on iTunes. Makes me miss my guitar.

Wow, it's the 23rd- this month is going too fast. There's something about impending deadlines that makes my life go into warp speed. Which is why I keep having overdue fines on my library books, the library doesn't understand the time/space vortex of writing a thesis. Anyway, I've had a good week. I finally got the long awaited Biography of Anna Kingsford from Amazon.com, which had to be shipped from some religious publishing house in the States. Now all I have to do is read it, and try not to think about my credit card bill.
Lots of friends returned from visits home this week, I saw Julia P. on Sunday, we basked in the sun enjoying milkshakes and talked about a wide variety of things. It was good to catch up, I hadn't seen her in so long. Kristen also came back after a long trip to the States to visit her family, so we got together and rented a movie- The Family Stone (which had this weird combination of really good acting and the worst plot line I've even seen in a romantic comedy). Nonetheless, it was a fun night and we made tentative travel plans, as we are wont to do. I've got a bit of the travelling bug, I wasn't planning on going anywhere this summer but after doing all that tourism in May I want more! Anyway, Kristen was offered the same teaching job I was, but choose to go with a higher paying office job instead. Sometimes I'm amazed how I've had so many jobs in my life and still managed to avoid working in an office. It's a talent.
On Saturday Sarah had a party at her house, and once I got there I realized how long it had been since I'd been to a house party. I had more than a few undergrad flashbacks. Some of her friends from London came down, and I got along really well with them. They've promised to take me to a cricket match, though I suspect they may not recollect making that promise.
I've had a lot of exam invigilating hours this week, and accepted more for next week even though I said I wouldn't. It just seems ridiculous to turn down making money for standing around for a few hours in the afternoon. I mean, in all honestly I spend the same amount of time in a day surfing the internet.
I just finished reading The Tent by Margaret Atwood- is this out in Canada? It was such a strange read, oddly like the visions Anna Kingsford wrote. So interesting, though, all the bizarre imagary she's known for. She was here for Hay Festival which I couldn't afford to go to, as was Jeanette Winterson. Sigh. My literary stalking has not gone nearly as well as I was hoping when I first moved here.
Well, happy Summer Solstice.

My hovercraft is full of eels!

2006-06-17T11:36:00.000+01:00

Not much to report this week. My time basically consists of writing and researching the thesis, going to work, and going to pubs. Even though pubs were to be avoided this week as the World Cup is in full swing, and much like the Stanley Cup, people use it as an excuse to get drunk and act like they're on another plane of existence. I tell you, someone's making a killing out of all the football merchandise being sold in this country- it's everywhere! Underwear, barbecues, pizza all with the English flag on them. From an outsiders point of view it all looks a little nationalist, but what do I know!
And I have to admit I've discovered Youtube.com, which keeps me entertained when overcome by the need to procrastinate. It is weird that I watched three hours of clips from the Daily Show?
We had our last nineteenth-century seminar group on Tuesday, which was sad as it was the major social occasion in my week. The paper, on the poetry of Emily Bronte, was also interesting. The next morning I went for training for my teaching job, which really clarified nothing, but I got to meet the people I'm teaching with. They both also study at Sussex and have taught English before, so I feel like I'll be in good company.
The weather's still warm, but not stick-your-head-in-the-freezer suffocating kind of heat we were subject to last week. It was so humid I was close to shaving my head. There are still hoards of people outside my window, but I've started to remember this before I throw open my window.

And, because you never need a reason for Monty Python....

Lazy Hazy Crazy Days

2006-06-10T11:54:00.000+01:00

Hello everyone. It's a wonderful Saturday morning, I've slept in and am now sitting on front of my window watching people frolic on the beach in the sun, with a cup of coffee in my hands. Remember that scene from The Life of Brian when he wakes up and opens his window, only to find a throng of people staring at him? I experienced something very similar this morning, though I suspect they wern't actually there to see me and may not have even been looking at me, it just seemed that way when I realized I wasn't dressed yet.
I think it's the first day in the week I haven't had to be anywhere, which I know is normal for most people, but in the life of a grad student weekends are generally indistinguishable from weekdays. I started my exam invigilator job on Monday, and will now have money in my bank account on Monday, which will directly go to the purchase of a pair of sandals. The job is a little on the boring side, and also a little strange because I think I'm the only invigilator who isn't a teacher and has being doing this for years. I'm really not that sure why they hired me. It's very strange to watch these kids writing their exams, it doesn't really seem so long ago that was me. Man I used to get nervous about finals, I had lucky pens I'd use and all these weird rituals. Anyway, I work about 15 hours a week, and it's just for this week and next week. Then hopefully I have a week off before I start my teaching job in July. I'm really looking forward to it, even though I also don't feel I'm very qualified for it. I've been doing lots of research and trying to get up the guts to start writing- I always have this problem, it's like the very act of putting my ideas on paper makes them imperfect. Ideas always seem better in my head! I'm also waiting for some important books from Amazon, the complete biography of Anna Kingsford, which cost me lots but I really need to start writing. I'm still debating whether I want to get a hold of the Theosophical Society in London, which may have some interesting material for me to look at, but they also seem a little crazy. They don't even give out an email address, so I have to send them a letter? Sigh.
But not to worry, I've also done a fair deal of non-work, or unwork to be Orwellian. My friend Sarah found my profile on My Space, which I totally forgot I had, and discovered we shared a penchant for 80's romantic comedies. So on Wednesday we got "take away" and watched Sleepless in Seattle, which I can never watch too many times. It's a close second to When Harry Met Sally. Thursday I spent the entire day in the British Library, so on returning home the only thing my brain could handle was playing Sims all night. Yesterday the Women's Group organized a demonstration outside the building where the Miss Brighton contest was being held, which is connected the the Miss England and Miss World thing, and has some horrible stipulations for its contestants, like they can't have had children or be outside the ages of 17-24. The demonstration went well, some of the contestants came down and talked to us, most of them seeming to actually agree with us, which was interesting. We sat on the beach afterwards for a while, then when the temperature started to drop I went back home and some of my flatmates proposed a movie night. We watched Before Sunset, which I had never heard of but was sold on when told it starred Ethan Hawke. I think I still have a little crush on him from when I used to watch The Dead Poet's Society weekly. Well, time to face that blank Word document.
Ta for now.

Randomness

2006-06-04T18:24:00.000+01:00

First sunburn of the year! I love summer. Sitting on the beach makes me feel like I'm 9 again. Except no one makes me sandwiches with the crusts cut off anymore. Sigh.

A visual summary of my third meeting with my supervisor:

So Blogger lets me post comics, but not photos? Yee Gosh.

A non-linear travel diary

2006-06-02T10:45:00.000+01:00

Well, where to begin? I am horrible at the travel log thing, I can remember everything I did but have no idea in what order they occurred. All in all the trip was great, it was by far the most traveling and the longest sojourn I have even taken, so it was a but of a rush. Sitting at home on front of my computer makes me feel so sedentary. Anyway, London was first on the list and it rained for most of the time we were there, so unfortunately we couldn't do everything on the spectacular tour I had planned. We managed to hit both Tates and the National Gallery, as well as Madame Tussard's and Carnaby Street, among other things discovered along the way. I only dragged them to one geeky literary place of interest, 221b Baker Street, home of the Sherlock Holmes museum. Les Mis was amazing, by far the best theatrical experience I have ever had. I was a flag waving French liberal by the time we were out of the theatre. I rarely expect to enjoy musicals so much. We also found time to take in the Da Vinci Code, which contrary to popular opinion I actually enjoyed, in fact I was hoping it would be more controversial. I mean, the general public has never heard of the gnostic gospels? Anyway, we caught the Chunnel to Paris and I found it an underwhelming experience, though incredibly efficient. I was hoping for that ticket price to have a more classy train, liked a supped-up Orient Express. Maybe there would be a murder I could solve. But just an ordinary train. I don't think I really detected the difference between being in England and being in France until we got out of the train and into Paris, when suddenly I couldn't speak my first language and I was utterly unfamiliar with the geography. It took us a while to figure out how to catch a taxi. We had a lovely hotel room which seemed somehow quintessentially French, and spend the next four days hitting the pavement. Though I don't think the amount of tourism we did could fit into a neat little blog entry, highlites include: 1) the Notre Dame: I've seen a lot of churches on this side of the Atlantic, but this took my breathe away. The parallel of such minute details and such grandeur makes the rest of the world look one dimensional. 2) Eiffel Tower: predictable, I know I should be cultured and shun such a tourist trap, but it was just so neat to see a cultural icon you've known your entire life in reality. We were too restless to spend hours in line to go to the top, so we got some ice cream and walked around the tower getting good views from as many possible angles as possible. 3) Pantheon: once again, just another tourist attraction, but you have never felt the sense of being so physically small as when you stand inside this place, unless maybe you have been in outer space. And not only was the size of the building amazing, but the crypt underneath allowed me to stand next to the tombs of Rousseau and Voltaire (who I had a brief conversation with at Madame Toussard's). 4) Street vendors: the streets of Paris have more life to them then I've seen in any other city. It's like no one who lives here has a home, they just sit in cafes, buy stuff, sell stuff, or perform some kind of skill for money. We ate pastries, bought funky jewelry, watched spontaneous breakdancing, and then ate some more pastries. After Paris we flew back to London and decided to spend a few days in Canterbury, where I've always wanted to go and would likely be a nice change from the overpowering energy of London and Paris. It indeed proved to be a good place to spend the last few days of our vacation, and we contributed a great deal to the local economy as we did more shopping there than all the other cities we visited put together. Some of the best second hand clothing shops in the country, I tell you. The cathedral of course was beautiful, totally different architecture than what we'd seen in France. We took a very informative tour down The River Stour and ate in a pub established in the 16th century. Our hotel had what sounded like pigeons in the walls and no hot water, but Julia and I got our own room and the TV was in English, a great benefit of trying to watch French/German TV in Paris. Julia and Mom came back to Brighton for one last day, and I managed to show them around the Laines shopping area before they slept and left bright and early this morning. It was tough to say goodbye, I got so used to having them around. I've decided any future seperations should take place while I'm sleeping or drugged, I'm just no good at them. Anyway, because I was in London anyway, I hit the British Library and tried to make up for all the work I didn't do over our travels. I read almost 300 pages, which was about all my eyes could take, and now have to deal with all these emails and phone messages I should return. I have to submit my proposal and title tomorrow, so I have no time for post-travel doldrums, which I usually get a bad case of. I miss Paris already. C'est dommage.

Blogger still won't let me post pictures- anyone know why it would be doing this? Blogger help is no help at all.

On The Town

2006-05-20T21:59:00.000+01:00

Hello all. Once again, apologies for sporadic posting. It's been a crazy week, there's no other word for it. It's been a week of researching, family, and theatre. I've seen three shows since I got back from Dublin, all rather spontaneously. Sarah and I decided to see the Theatre Royal's rendition of Paradise Lost two hours before it started when we found out students could get "restricted viewing" seats for 6 pounds. I really enjoyed the show, despite having only made my way through Book 1 of the poem. The staging was very kinetic, with lots of lights and sounds. In the end Adam and Eve were condemned to wear business suits and drink Starbucks coffee, so there was a bit of directional license taken. Wednesday I went to Kristen act in a play written and produced by another fellow grad student, it was a very much a student production, a little over ambitious and angsty but very creative. The program said something like it was a combination of Orwellian dystopia and Kafka-esque drama, and that about describes it. When Mom and Julia arrived on Friday we went to see a local production called the Fairy Queen, which contrary to my expectations had nothing to do with the Spencer poem and was instead a baroque opera set in a mental asylum. A little confusing, but I really got into the music and had baroque in my head for the rest of the night. I think all of us were a little too tired to take it all in, so I sent the family back to the hotel and crashed back at my room. Today we were up bright and early for a trip to London, mainly to visit the Tate Modern as my sister has been dying to see. Quite the experience, the building and even the coffee shop felt excessively modern, as did the punk kids hanging around the film exhibits. I got to see my favorite Jackson Pollock, and a lot of works I had only vaguely heard of but really needed to see in person anyway.
I also had a really good research day on Thursday, my most productive trip to the British Library yet. I flipped through a survey of work that had been done on Anna Kingsford throughout the last century and all over the world. Some of it was really interesting, some of it made me grumpy. Why is it that people feel the need to pathologize strong independent-minded women? Someone even decided her search for religious truth was just displaced maternal instinct. Because anyone with ovaries really can't think seriously about anything that doesn't have to do with babies. Yeesh. I emailed my supervisor full of self-righteous indignation and big ideas, and as of yet she hasn't emailed me back.
I found out I didn't get the library job, they wanted me to start right away which just wasn't doable, so exam invigilation it is.
We're heading to France next week, but first we see Lewes Castle and the Da Vinci Code tomorrow, and then Les Mis in London on Monday! What a cultured month this has been, at this rate I have to run into Stephen Fry at some point.
Anyone have any must-sees in their Paris experience? Right now my list consists of everything, so I should probably narrow it down a little.

At Swim, One Girl

2006-05-12T11:21:00.000+01:00

Sorry for the delayed entry, the day I got back just zoomed by and I didn't have any quality blogging time, then our internet connection disappeared. For the sake of brevity I think I might just provide some general remarks about my trip, instead of taking you through a lengthy three day play-by-play, which I will probably do for most of you in person someday anyway :)

1) I liked Dublin as soon as I got there, and I wrote in my journal that it felt more like home than England did. I couldn't really explain why, and it took a trip through the enlightening Dublin Writer's Museum to make me think a bit more about Ireland's history, and how in many ways it's had to struggle to define itself like Canada has. The city had a feel of defensive regionalism, a fierce pride in just being Irish.
2) The literary culture of Ireland also reminded me of Canada, specifically Western Canada and our "prairie literature". Walking into any Dublin bookstore, of which there were many, you are immediately faced with a wall of "Irish writers" and "Irish interest" books. Dublin seems to have quite a literary scene, lots of readings by local authors going on and such. There are also monuments to Irish authors all over the city, from Joyce to Beckett, St. Patrick's Cathedral even has monuments to great Irish writers. My observations on this might have been a bit skewed because I was looking for literary landmarks, so they might not have been as prominent as I thought, but really, I couldn't think of anywhere else I've been where I bumped into life size statues of modernists.
3) Visiting so many birthplaces of writers I admire left me feeling sort of existential angsty. Though it was great fun to see them, an experience I'd never pass on, it's never really gratifying. I had just finished reading Pygmalion by George Bernard Shaw on the plane, and then hours later I was standing on the doorstep where he used to get his paper in the morning. It's really hard to reconcile the two, the great pieces of work and the little white nondescript house. It makes my wonder if it matters, if where were sleep and eat is a crucial part of our biography or not. I almost got a little emotional at Oscar Wilde's place, I'm still not really sure why. I think I might have been frustrated, as much as I've read Wilde and his biographies, I still couldn't picture him walking out this door to catch a cab or go for a stroll in Merrion Square. Speaking of which, there's a statue of Wilde in the park which I have mixed feelings about. At first I thought it was horrible to commemorate someone with a smirk on their face, but then I read something about it representing his "divided nature" (if you look at it from one side he looks like he's smiling, sort of, and from the other side he looks pensive). Still, he looks like he's leering at you and I don't think he was the leering type.
4) I need to read more Irish literature. I really don't think before my trip I could have named a contemporary Irish author. It's depressing that never in my too many years of schooling was Irish literature ever taught, or even mentioned. I did find out that John Banville, who I was a little upset won the Booker last year because I really wanted Zadie Smith to win, is Irish so all Booker-anger is forgiven. I asked book store employees to recommend their favorite novel by and Irish writer, and they all said At-Swim-Two-Birds by Flann O-Brian, so it's next on my reading list.
5) The next trip I plan I'll re-evaluate the "I'll just walk around for three days" plan, as it leaves me with giant dents in my shoulders and blisters on my feet. I slept for like 10 hours every night. Thankfully Dublin has some spectacular parks where I could sit and rest my weary feet.

Well hopefully that was a readable length for you all. For some reason Blogger isn't letting me post pictures, so I'll put them on up on Flickr. I am now going to go sit on the beach and do research, which is really the best part about living in Brighton.

*Edit* After finding out I have lots of hours doing exam invigilation at Varndean College, I got a call yesterday for an interview at the University library. How is it that I've been applying for jobs since I got here and now they all call me in May? I suspect conspiracy.

The Voyage Out

2006-05-07T11:48:00.000+01:00

I thought I would provide a mini update today, so later on in the week I don't have to cram two eventful trips into one post and make you all read an extremely lengthy blog entry.
Yesterday Jan (of the HOST program fame, who took me to the castle months ago) took a group of us lonely students on a trip through Sussex countryside. I was along for the ride mostly because we were stopping at Charleston, home of the Bloomsbury Group, but more than happy to make a stop at Arlington, home of the most spectacular Bluebells in the world at their very prime (according to Jan- I took her word for it). I was thrilled to find the walk included a petting zoo with sheep and goats, the small version of which I called "goatlettes" and was quickly corrected by an unimpressed eight year old: "they're called kids". Yeesh. Anyway, I was far more awe-struck by the bluebells than expected, sometimes being such a city girl I forget the sort of reverence only the natural world can inspire in me. Thousands of bluebells (which, oddly, are bright purple) surrounded us and the ground appeared to be a gently swaying mass of violet petals. I took pictures but they don't even come close to capturing the fields, though they do have pictures on their website that come a little closer. After a quick lunch at a pub, where I had the best garlic bread ever, with chunks of garlic actually baked into the bread, we headed up to Charleston and drove right into the on-coming rain. Thankfully most of the Charleston tour was indoors, we were guided around and watched to make sure we didn't touch anything and given little anecdotes about the various individuals that have lived there. The inhabitants of the house had rather complicated relationships, so I'll likely get some of the details wrong, but basically the house was home to Vanessa Bell and her siblings, one being Virginia. Vanessa married Clive Bell, an art critic, throughout the years they both had various affairs with other people. Vanessa was in love with the artist Duncan Grant, who spent most of his time at Charleston, and who was homosexual, though this didn't stop them from having a child together. Others who spent time with the group, unknownst to me, included the economist John Meynard Keynes and Roger Fry, who was also on very friendly terms with Vanessa. Anyway, the influence of Vanessa and Duncan Grant are most obvious in the house, with every bare surface being painted or decorated in some inventive manner. They've collected quite a bit of the original furniture and art work that was in the house, so it all feels very authentic, like you're intruding into someone's home. Most of the impressive book collection belonges to Quentin Bell, Vanessa and Clive's son, who taught art history at U of S. They had various art works and photographs hung around the house, I loved the photograph of T.S. Eliot and E.M. Forster just hanging out on the lawn- perhaps the most interesting photo involving a lawn ever! I think Jan and the gang expected me to be an expert on the workings of the Bloomsbury group, but I had to admit I knew more about Vanessa and Virginia's father than the more bohemian younger generation, which I think made me significantly less cool. Anyway, the garden was also beautiful, and though it was raining too hard to wander around in it, I ran out and took some quick pictures. I have pledged to someday have a garden like that- ok, first learn to garden and then have a garden like that- because there's no way you couldn't be inspired sitting in such a beautiful place.
We then moved on to near by Monk's House, where Leonard and Virginia lived for a few years and summers. We couldn't look around much of it, as I found out later an ancestor still lives upstairs, but you could tell it had to feel of a place very lived in and constantly in transition. I could picture lots of unfinished projects taking place. Virginia had her own detached room out in the garden, which still holds her original furniture. Pretty cool. Also a very nice garden, they must have spent a fortune on gardeners. I think I got more out of these literary landmark more than any others I've been to- the houses seemed to have a life of their own, as opposed to, say, Lewis Carroll's or Dickens', which are only interesting because those particular people lived there, the place itself doesn't have much resonance. Does that make sense?

I came home feeling like my life was significantly boring and maybe I should start painting my walls and furniture. Though I don't think the Bloomsbury Group had to worry about getting a damage deposit back.

Tomorrow is my Dublin trip and I've got to get packing- I'm not taking any check-on luggage, so I'll have to carefully measure my backpack before I go to make sure I can take it on the plane with me. I love staying in hostels but it would be nice to not have to carry everything I take with me on my back the whole trip.
More adventure stories to come!

Little darling ,it's been a long cold lonely winter, little darling, it seems like years since it's been clear.... (everybody!)

2006-05-03T18:15:00.000+01:00

I feel like these last few days have essentially been a vacation. I intended to do work but couldn't track down my supervisor who needs to approve my thesis topic before I do any more work on it. So really, my hands were tied. I was forced to spend so much time in pubs and tea shops. Last Saturday I did do a bit of internet research, I contacted the one other academic I could find who's working on Kingsford and asked him some elementary questions. Unfortunately, he lives in Portugal so language was a bit of a barrier. But he was very helpful. On Sunday Kristen and I spent the day together for the first time since term papers craziness began. It was good to see her again, we hung out at her place and ordered pizza (online! The new direction of pizza ordering communication), and talked about life and our intangible post-grad school lives. We then went to see a French movie called Lemming, which was supposed to be a psychological thriller but sort of ran the thin line between being scary and funny, but in a clever way. Very dark and weird. Monday, unknownst to me, was a bank holiday of some sort, so my plans to go to the Public Library were thwarted. After standing outside the library doors scratching my head for a while, I decided to walk down to Hove to visit the Volunteer Centre, and see what kind of opportunities they had. Though a lot of the application deadlines had passed, I'm going to see tomorrow about doing some work at a nearby community garden. Better than sitting on front of my computer all day, that's for sure. Tuesday was a busy day, by my standards, anyway. I met Sarah and Kaite at The Mock Turtle, a spectacular tea shop near my building, where we giggled over English department gossip amongst several elderly women who tried their best to tolerate us. I then sped up to the Uni to do some library research, the book I needed is a reference book so I can't take it out of the library. And you can't just remove the magnetic strip like you could at the MacKimmie library. Or so I hear, I of course have no first hand experience. I finally found Dr Taylor and she told me to come meet her tomorrow, so the pressure to have something intelligent to say mounted. I then made it in time for the 19th century seminar on (paradoxically) 18th Century Theatre. It was really interesting with lots of visuals, and afterwards we went out for dinner on the seminar's budget (yay!). Drinks followed. We ended up in a pub where everyone else seemed to be a on a date, which made us all depressed for various reasons and there was lots of sighing. I got up bright and early today to go see Dr Taylor, only to find she had triple booked me. One of the people she had also booked was Peter, a fellow MA student who I really get along well with but almost never see, so the situation worked out well as we had time to catch up. The meeting went well, thankfully she likes my idea and actually offered to supervise me, which was little like someone offering me 100 dollars. Yeah, sure, I guess. I was so flattered. She wants to meet in a week (yikes!) so I can present a bibliography and primary research sources, which is good because I need to end my self-appointed vacation. It's going to be tough, because I have unintentionally made vacation-like plans into next week, Jan's taking me to Charleston (where the Bloomsbury Group spent a lot of their time) on Saturday. It's literary themed, so that eases my conscience slightly. However, the plans I made to attend the Brighton Ghost Walk on Friday and then my flying to Dublin on Monday are just expressions of the adventure seeker in me.
I also have two friends with birthdays this month, so it would make me a horrible person if I missed those. I met Julia and some of her friends at the good old Mock Turtle today to celebrate her birthday, in some spectacular sunny weather. It was great fun and I learned all sorts of things about museum exhibits and human suspension weight loss devices. Saturday is Kristen's birthday but I think she still has no idea what she's doing. The family is coming up on the 18th, so I have to have to get some writing done before then, because with the amount of traveling they have planned I'll be surprised if we have time to sleep.
A few people have told me today that the Canadian dollar is doing very well. So well done. Some one also asked me if the Queen was mentioned in the Canadian national anthem, and from my memory she isn't. I wonder if she was edited out? God's still in there. Riveting issues, I know, but particularly relevant to a Canadian living in England. After all, my i-pod is named after the Governor General.

Warning: there are way too many pop-culture references in this post

2006-04-29T00:01:00.000+01:00

Well as predicted it's been quite a week. I've applied for lots of jobs, and am now "on call" at the Public Library (whether that means I actually work there or not I'm not sure) and am also going to be an exam invigilator for a local College some time this summer. Good new for potential travel plans. In trying to pull myself out of my mid-year slump, I attempted various activities which were new and exciting:

I was convinced into watching Sin City, and through the gap in my fingers the cinematography seemed really interesting. It was recommended I resist doing a political analysis of it, so I ate my popcorn and enjoyed Clive Owen.
I made a meal from scratch, meaning I actually used a recipe. Observe, a homemade vegetarian curry:

I am now too full to ever eat again.

I allowed myself to read entire issues of the London Review of Books. Someone lent me a whole bunch of back issues and they've just been sitting there. It's actually a fairly political and theoretical publication, and the likes of Elaine Showalter and Terry Eagleton occasionally write articles about things that have nothing to do with their more widely known research.

Anyway, I kept myself busy. On Tuesday I went to a lecture about Lewis Carroll and psychopomps, which are beings that represent an individual's soul/subconscious (a la white rabbits). It was a great new word to learn. The lecture, unfortunately wasn't so great. It was done by an "independent scholar." Really, who are these people? What a strange breed of person just decides to do literary theory as a hobby? He also looked like the old guy from Jurassic Park. I was left alone to make small talk with him and I the only thing I could think to ask was whether he had heard Marilyn Manson was planning on playing Lewis Carroll in a movie. Marilyn Manson, the eminent scholar. Seriously. Anyway, I spent Wednesday researching Anna Kingsford, who is my latest 19th century preoccupation and just may be my thesis topic. Anyway, like most subjects I pick to study there's nothing in print by or about her so I've had to put my patience to the test in seeking out many dead-end research leads. I gave up around 7 pm and went to meet Sarah (another 19th c. MA student) at the pub. We've decided to start getting there earlier than everyone else so we can talk about people before they get there. It was extremely effective. It was a good night and I got some helpful bibliographic advise from a PhD friend. I made a graceful exit earlier than usual, as I didn't want to be hung over for Thursday's gothic adventure. The next day Julia and I took the train up to the London Tate and wandered around the "Gothic Nightmares" exhibition. On a whole I enjoyed it, I like gothic themed things and a lot of the literature I study is influenced by it. The set up was a little weird, very dark and the little blurbs they put beside the pieces were really badly written. Julia was speechless. Being jaded academics, we questioned their rather broad definition of "gothic", which seemed to include anything early to mid 19th c. and creepy. I was especially suspicious of their use of Blake. None the less, worth the trip for sure. Fuseli's The Nightmare is even more uncanny in person. We wandered around other sections of the museum for a while, and was reduced to a blob when I got to see the Pre-Raphaelite paintings. Such an experience. By the time were got to the Turner wing we had to recharge, as I had not worn practical standing shoes. After the museum we went to see My Name is Rachel Corrie at the beautiful Playhouse Theatre. The play was well acted and really haunting, about a young American girl who was killed doing humanitarian work in Palistine. It was a little didactic at times, but that's hard to avoid with such a loaded topic. I think the play unsettled me because the way she was portrayed reminded me of myself when I was younger. Anyway, it was directed by some guy named Alan Rickman who I think Julia is vaguely familiar with? Sadly, he wasn't to be spotted. I spent the night in a really cute little hostel, on top of a pub, and was more anti-social than hostel goers are supposed to be, but I'm really into the Martin Amis book I started in my computer-free days. I was worried about over- sleeping, as I didn't have any sort of alarm with me, so my internal clock kept waking me up every hour. But I did get up on time for tea and cornflakes. I didn't end up meeting Kaite, but I went to the demonstration we were going to go to anyway. There was about ten of us who showed up, and lots of media. Two rape survivors gave moving speeches and we did some loud chanting while bus loads of tourists took our picture. A lot of the other women there were authors of blogs I read all the time, so it was cool to put faces to names. We all agreed to do some more direct action stuff sometime in the future, and then I left because it was cold and the British Library closes early today. I did a minimal amount of research, and discovered Kingsford had an incredibly annoying editor who kept inserting irrelevant personal anecdotes in footnotes. This is what happens when you let your boyfriend write your only biography. Anyway, I whizzed back home on the train, stumbled home and had a nap, and then cooked while watching Law and Order. Itunes keeps playing "All Things Must Pass" by George Harrison, I think it's a sign that my slump is coming to an end.

Thanks to everyone who has offered kind words over the last few weeks.

A la prochaine.

The Return of the Laptop and in an unrelated event Queen Elizabeth turns 80

2006-04-21T21:36:00.000+01:00

At last- after exactly two weeks of being told "your computer should be ready in one, maybe two days" my baby is safe and sound at home with me. That being said, she has complete amnesia and I have to re-download all our favorite programs and remind her of my favorite websites, but I can handle that. I've got a new wallpaper on my desktop for the first time in like a year, it's truly a sign of spring.
So all the fractured communications of the last few weeks can basically be summed up visually:

It was that kind of week. Two very theoretical and research based papers to finish, which will likely determine if I will graduate with distinction or not, hung over my head like that axe in Beowulf. I scuttled back and forth to the University, spent the whole day being the only person on campus and realizing that if someone tried to kill me in the IT building no one would find me until bank holidays were over. I lost my British Library research notes to the laptop crisis, so my bibliography went incomplete. It was bad enough they made me use Chicago style citation (footnotes! How inartistic). I had trouble saving my papers onto a floppy disk, loosing some of my work for a second time, then had an enlightened moment in which I realized I could store my papers on my ipod! I am still mostly a luddite, but I do love my ipod. So anyway, Wednesday I was up at campus at 7 am, which is like the middle of the night for me, working away until the 11th hour (literally, papers were due at noon) and about 11:30 was when all the campus printers simultaneously made a sad grinding noise and refused to print. Chaos ensued, things got violent and someone made one of the librarians cry! Deadlines make students revert to primitive survival methods. Thankfully, at about 11:47 I remembered the Humanities graduate department had its own little printer grad students were allowed to use, so I booted it up there and got my papers in at 11:58. I then went to visit my friend Sarah who works at the Student's Union, who made me sit down because I was greenish. Later on I had to go to a seminar on dissertation writing, which was horrifically boring (20 minutes on why you shouldn't plagerize, because so many of us just weren't convinced) but gave me lots of comedic material, because the presenter who-shall-not-be-named is not popular amongst the student population. I made it to a Woman's Group meeting, went home and presumably consumed something, then went straight to meet friends at the pub and tried my best to not look like I was half asleep. Yesterday I recovered from my trauma and read A Complicated Kindness by Miriam Toews, who I'm pretty sure I met at McNally years ago? Anyway, great read. Sort of a more light-hearted Margaret Laurence. Today I've been working on my computer, sending off emails like crazy and planning my Dublin trip. There's a protest going on in London next week regarding rape sentencing (apparently now they're giving rapists "cautions", like speeding tickets) and it seems I'm in charge of getting people from Brighton to London for it, so emails need to be followed up there.
After this I'm totally going to watch Four Weddings and a Funeral (I know I've watched this movie more than is healthy, but if I have one pop culture weakness it might as well be Hugh Grant movies) and drink my new fancy tea, advertised by Stephen Fry. It's the Queen's birthday, so I'm making more of an effort than usual to mimic Britishness.
We wish you a good weekend. That is if anyone is reading this- I'm convinced that Herman Melville joke scared any readers I had away. No more bad puns from now on, cross my heart.
Cheerio.

ps- Lewes pictures are up on Flickr. Theatrics and history abound.

Yummy anti-depressants that are also amusing

2006-04-18T18:20:00.000+01:00

Happy Easter/Non-denominational-spring-themed-holiday

Always look on the bright side of life (even when your computer dies and then the computer repair guys go on vacation)

2006-04-14T11:37:00.000+01:00

Hi folks. Well, it's been a trying week but at the advice of a helpful well-wisher I'm going to focus on the positives:

1. On Monday Julia got my negative ass out of bed and we went to visit Lewes, a little town near Brighton- spontaneous tourism, the best kind. We wandered around the central area, saw a beautiful church and graveyard, stumbled across the "Fifteenth Century Bookshop" and then walked down to Anne of Cleves' house. Sometimes traveling in England is like walking in and out of timewarps. We then sat for a while in a stunning Grange, and though I don't really know what a grange is there were flowers and squirrels, so I was contented. Next we walked up a practically vertical road, and entered the Lewes Castle. Not the most majestic castle, but definitely the most entertaining as there were several photo ops just waiting for people like Julia and I to use for silliness. The best of these being a collection of medieval dress-up clothes. I was a Lady, a peasant and a knight all in one day, I felt like a simulacrum of class mobility. The museum attached to the castle was a little strange as was the history of Lewes, apparently. It was a great day.

2. I have done so much reading. And not panic inducing research, but novels that have nothing to do with my work. Some of the highlites:
*Lighthousekeeping by Jeanette Winterson- like Written on the Body but with a more structured plot line. Amazingly written.
*Atonement by Ian McEwan- a really good read, but almost the same story as Ann Marie McDonald's Where the Crow Flies. Maybe it was just my imagination.
*The Bloody Chamber by Angela Carter- I have a vague feeling I've read this before, but non the less always enjoy a good creepy fairytale
*Larry's Party by Carol Shields- Well, I'm not quite done this one but it's all very Woolfian and pretty funny.
*The Portrait of Mr W.H. by Oscar Wilde- ok, this was kind of research but still a pleasurable read, very observant about people wrapped up in literary culture.

3. As my plans to go to France after my papers are due seem to have fallen through, I'm planning a trip on my own to Dublin. I'm all about the literary tours and I'm staying a hostel in the same neighbourhood that Oscar Wilde lived in. Squeal! I've totally got the traveling bug.

Writing that did make me feel better. Now to throw all my angst into paper writing, then into Easter chocolate eating. Times like these call for high sugar provisions.

I don't like Mondays

2006-04-10T12:19:00.000+01:00

I apologize for my sudden disappearance- on Thursday my computer started making weird noises and on Friday it gave up the ghost. The computer guy thinks the hard drive is fried, but he should be able to recover my files (whew!). Needless to say it's very frustrating to have papers due in a week and have no computer, so I'm extremely grumpy today and can't think of any anecdotes to liven things up. But I'll be in touch when things return to normal.

grumble grumble grumble

And he was a vegetarian!

2006-04-06T11:15:00.000+01:00

he he. Behold the power of procrastination.

What Famous Leader Are You?
personality tests by similarminds.com

At least I'm not Hitler.

And now for something completely different

2006-04-01T00:05:00.000+01:00

What? It's the weekend again? Sorry, I can't hear you from underneath all these books. Books books books. Now I love books, but I'm beginning to get what my friend once called "book panic." Too many books, too little time. The problem is these books aren't recreational, they are mandatory. I read a chapter today and it was a little like bailing water out of the Titanic. Maybe I should just make a heroic exit. But I did get 1000 words done in my Wilde essay, which I think is going to be a really interesting paper, if I do say so myself. Foucault, the Bible and the OED all feature in the introductory paragraph- throw in a martini and it's a party!

Yesterday I left my cave and went to London, to do what was supposed to be purely a research trip but ended up being about a third research and two thirds tourism. What can I say, I love London! I spent the first part of the day at the Women's Library at the Metropolitan University, which was a nice break from the British Library. I stared at periodicals on mircofilm looking for references to vegetarianism, and though I was mostly blind by the end I came out with lots of good quotables. Afterwards I went to the National Gallery (I couldn't go to the Tate because I already have that trip promised to Julia P!) and wandered around for three hours. The building itself was beautiful, and the rooms had spectacular William Morris-like decorations. I stood in gap-jawed awe on front of Rubens, Turner, Van Gogh, Monet and Gauguin, among others. Being a bit of an artistic philistine I can't offer much commentary besides OH MY GOD! Nothing compared to looking at them in text books. I think my favorite was Faa Iheihe by Gauguin. Like staring at a dream. Anyway, afterwards I ate my apple in Trafalgar Square amongst the pigeons, then walked down to the embankment and wandered along the Thames. I totally accidentally ran into Herman Melville. I said, "Hi I'm Jen." He said "call me Ishmael." He he. I apologize for that joke. The writers of the joke have just been sacked. Ok, the Monty Python joke was worse. Those responsible for the sacking have just been sacked.

Wordsworth once wrote: "Milton! thou should'st be living at this hour: England hath need of thee: she is a fen of stagnant waters" And I wrote my own poem in reply: "Wordsworth! London is smellier now than it was in 1802: more fen-like by the decade! Alas!" Seriously, the Thames was the most polluted water I have ever seen, including the green foam that surrounds the Niagara Falls. None the less, the view epitomizes London, a sort of productive chaos.

I took the tube back to Buckingham Palace, sat on the monument for a while and tried to check my email on my laptop, but was disappointed to find HRM's internet was password protected. What, like she needs the extra few bucks? Puh-lease. I read for a bit, then walked down to catch my bus. I was really tired, but had to get up early today to sell myself in psychological experiment and go to the library to return my Sally Ledger book that someone has recalled. Grrrr. But I got home to find an email from someone who had "heard about my work" and wanted to chat- my very first networking email! She is working on sort of contemporary vegetarian diets, but wanted some historical background info. And I am all about the background. I edited some work for a friend, thus having the rare opportunity to make my skills as an English major applicable in the real world. I then toiled away on my essay, but stopped because I think I have carpal tunnel, or whatever it is- my wrists really hurt. I think I should get some sort of compensation. Oh yes, and this sign is in my elevator:

Ok, I think England needs to accept it has a bird problem. I cannot tailor my needs to the pigeons. Yeesh.

No abnormal dreams featuring nineteenth century figures to report- I'm taking this as a good sign.

Have a good weekend all!

Mr Hyde is unleashed and just sits in his room and reads

2006-03-27T17:50:00.000+01:00

Not much to report this week. I'm holed up in my room working on my term papers, occasionally shuttling back and forth to the library. Paper time brings out the inner crazy person in me- I swear I didn't even get out of my pajamas this weekend. And I'm not so much eating meals as foraging. I almost caught myself calling Sally Ledger's book which took me weeks to get "my precious." These are things they don't tell you about grad school in the pretty pamphlets.

I had a dream in which I met Henry David Thoreau at a house party and he told me "I feel like someday I could really trust you." He had an umbrella in his drink. Like I said, inner crazy person.

I also found out that I am officially accepted in the Sussex graduate program, as it took U of C a wee but longer than accepted to send over my transcripts. It's nice to know half way through your degree that you're allowed to be there. Had the letter said otherwise I probably would have turned into a Jen-Hulk. Not pretty.

Well that's all I got. In a month I will rejoin the human race. I know it all sounds a little Jekyll and Hyde, but I'm pretty sure I'm not turning into a short bald man just yet.

Elevation

2006-03-20T17:45:00.000Z

Well here I am, alive and in one piece. I've completed week of equally balancing social drinking and defending my work. If this were an academic Survivor, I would totally still be on the island (though probably drunk). On Tuesday I explained to Dr. Quinn (the professor, not the medicine woman) why I thought Wilde's Salome would make a good feminist study, which was a hard sell because Wilde is kind of a Queer Theory icon here and work on him usually revolves around his sexuality. On April Fools Day I might declare to the English department that I think Oscar Wilde was straight and wait until they start tying me to a stake and gathering kindling to say "Just kidding!". Anyway, I was relieved to find he liked the idea and he gave me some good angles to consider, ones that no other critic has discussed before, which are my favorite kind. Tuesday was also my very last day of classes in my entire Masters degree, which made me feel like I wasn't quite ready to be thrown out into the world on my own, and also that I was going to miss the people in my classes quite a bit. Wednesday I went to see Alan Sinfield, who is renowned for his work on Wilde and other gay writers, talk about Shakespeare's sonnets. Knowing embarrassingly little about Shakespeare, the whole talk was revelationary to me. That evening was drinks with various grad students, in which we deconstructed the signification of a nearby mop. Thursday I got a badly needed haircut (don't worry, not too short) and chewed my nails over revisions of my upcoming conference paper. Friday I didn't get out of my pajamas until 8 pm, as I was doing some last minute research and writing the introductory paragraphs to both my papers (hey, you've gotta start somewhere). It being St.Patrick's Day, Kristen and I ventured out to find what English people do to celebrate, and the answer predictably enough, was drink. For a while we stood uncomfortably in a packed bar while I lamented forgetting to wear green, then her friend Ollie the New Zealander came by and we went to his flat for green apple Schnapps and watched the "top 100 Irish songs of all time" countdown on the telly. I still constantly have U2 in my head. And who knew Enya was Irish? First Van Morrison, now this. I feel as though my knowledge of UK music is entirely dominated by Beatles trivia. When I got home the flat above me was apparently still partying, so I stayed up until 3:30 reading Andrea Dworkin. I slept in on Saturday, and woke up with the rare urge to clean. This doesn't happen very often, so I went with it and vacuumed and put all my books into neat piles. You can even see the surface of my desk now. Julia P came over in the evening and we had a great chat about a million different things, giggled a great deal, and read our conference papers to each other. This turned out to be helpful and she gave me some good editing suggestions. Sunday I did groceries and was starting to feel an oncoming burn out, so I hung out with my flatmate Jill for a while, we went for a great stroll down the beach and cooed at all the cute dogs and children. I talked to my mother, and then started to plan the inevitable next trip to the British Library. I tried to go to bed early but my mind seem determined to make me think I had forgotten something and wouldn't let me sleep. I also had a dream about Sir Edmund Orme which did not help.
Nevertheless, I was up bright and early this morning to pick out my conference outfit and make some last minute notations on my paper. The conference started out well, the papers were all really diverse so despite being tired I was never bored. If you're interested you can look at the conference schedual here. There were lots of Early Modern papers, which is Uof S's pet historical period, but also two other papers on food culture and someone did a paper on early British amusement parks from around the time period I study, so I was tickled. I think my paper went ok, once I got up there and just started reading I felt pretty confident. I think I could have answered the questions a little more thoroughly, but they were good questions I was glad to see that people were more interested in 19th century vegetarianism than I expected. Julia's paper also went well, despite Powerpoint tribulations. During the tea break I even did some networking, though the woman who was bursting with advice for me left before I could get her email address. The rest of the conference was a little rougher, a guy who was acting a little creepy earlier gave a paper on Jewish and Christian relations which was sketchy in the conclusions he drew and also read entirely in a monotone voice. Then Julia and I both had to leave, I had to go mail off a job application before the post office closed- it's for teaching ELS, which would be great to have to get some teaching experience. Fingers crossed.
So I guess now I can hunker down and work on these terms papers, and this week I am for sure going to pick a thesis topic, even if this involves being struck by lightening for inspiration. But first I am going to reward myself with a pickle and peanut butter sandwich. Before you judge me, you should be aware that it was Elvis' favorite food (and he was also a Capricorn! Coincidence? Probably).

So how many of you have digested green beer in the last week? Come on, be honest.

Tales from the Crypt (metaphorically speaking)

2006-03-13T20:20:00.000Z

Jesus Christ it's the last week of classes. How did this happen to me? How is it that I do nothing but read yet never finish all the reading I intended to get done? Well, the answer is that I do a lot of other stuff besides reading, because spending all day in my room makes Jen a crazy girl (redrum redrum).

Today I went to my last 19th Century Sexualities class hung over, applied for two jobs, took out the entire library collection of books on Oscar Wilde, came home, read my conference paper over a few times and corrected the sentences which were aurally nonsensical. I have this odd craving for olives. Yesterday I went out with some of the creative writing MA students and talked about a potential trip to France after term papers (I can't wait to try my Canadian Franglaise over there) and I also had a spectacular cherry flavored beer which I just kept drinking because it was like drinking candy. Hence the hangover. Friday I went to see a talk by two Tibetan nuns at the Uni, and was practically in tears listening to their story. My problems seemed pathetic in comparison. But my spirits were lifted when my flatmate informed me that the Breakfast Club was on BBC1. I have to say, it only gets better with time. Even though I think Emilio was in his prime in 1985. Thursday was the 19th Century seminar, which was a fantastic paper on ballooning in the 19th century, and then the weekly drinking session which followed. All this socializing in pubs is going to give me a beer gut. I knew it was time to go home when I, thinking myself smart for avoiding the line for the women's washroom, barged in on some poor guy trying to urinate in the men's washroom and he actually screamed (can you say "castration anxiety"?).

We're doing Henry James in class tomorrow, I'm very excited- The Turn of the Screw still gives me goosebumps. And the other short story, Sir Edmund Orme was set in Brighton, in fact I think at one point the ghost in the story was supposed to be right on front of my building. And apparently the Society for Psychical Research that began at the end of the 19th century to figure out this ghost stuff is still going strong and doing all sorts of uncanny stuff.

Well I think I'm going to go sit down and read with my jar of olives, which I know is a little gross but this is what happens when students are left to their own devices....

Adieu.

The only day better than Christmas and perhaps post-Valentine's Day day:

2006-03-08T16:35:00.000Z

Is International Women's Day! Even when you're in England and everything is covered in damp mist and the sun has STILL not come out. Even then, a great day.
On Saturday I got to see Dr. Mary Evans (an eminent authority on feminist theory, especially Simone de Beauvoir) give a talk at the Uni. She was talking about the future of feminism and all in all approached the topic from a very intellectual and well-thought out standpoint. She's been teaching Women's Studies since the 70's, so obvious she's important to listen to. The drawback was that out of the whole audience, two men showed up and they managed to dominate the question period afterward so no one else, my self included, could get a word in. And I had a great question all planned out, too, damnit!
The rest of the week has pretty much been spent working on my conference paper and breathing into brown paper bags. I've got more than enough material but I'm afraid that because it might not interest other people as much as it interests me, I should make it more snappy. Julia P is using powerpoint, which sounds great, if only I had pictures to put on it. Maybe I could just use vague, comforting images, like sunsets and flowers? I've releaved a lot of my stress by going for long walks on the seafront, especially during the 1 or 2 hours in the afternoon when you can catch sunlight.
Yesterday Kristen and I went to be a performance of "Beckett's outbursts", in which three men read what they thought the be the most extreme parts of Samuel Beckett's novels. Some of them were hilarious, some of them were weird, some of them were down right disturbing. So I have fulfilled my modernist requirement for the year and can go back to the comfort of the 19th century in which hedgehogs are not slaughtered and life is pleasantly predictable. Our last class is next week, we're discussing Henry James and then going to the pub. Today after class I braved the mist/rain/annoying wetness to go to a Women's Health Workshop, which was informative but not really organized, so we just kind of sat around and talked for an hour.
I think today I'm going to take a break from my conference paper and research my Oscar Wilde paper instead. Oh Oscar, why can't you be alive and here to entertain me? Now there's a great thesis for my paper. I'm not sure Dr Quinn would go for it.

Au revoir pour maintenant!

British Library + Jen = Luv

2006-03-02T20:16:00.000Z

Well it's that awkward time of the evening when I can either hunker down and do something, or just give up on the night and watch pirated episodes of Gilmore Girls. I intend to put off the decision by spending some time on my valuable blog. The problem is I've spent all day researching, so despite the fact that this is prime time to do some writing because it's all still fresh in my head, and am sooo sick of work. I took another trip to the British Library and am very happy with my findings. I've got so many notes I could just read them out loud at the conference and though it would not be coherent it would be 20-25 minutes. I found two obscure essays which I really wanted and were just as brilliant as I hoped, mostly because they confirmed some ideas I already had so that made me feel kind of second-hand brilliant. I also found out that I can request to read anyone in the UK's PhD, so this guy who is not answering my emails from the University of Bradford is going to get a call from the British Library telling him to cough it up. Hah! I could get a little drunk on power in that place. I really do love it there- anything you want they can do it for you- a pamphlet put out by a crazy priest on prohibition from 1889? No problem. A journal no one's read since 1982? Just give us five minutes. Amazing I tell you. This time I splurged and took the train, which was much faster and not as nauseating. However, I made the mistake of leaving for home around 5 pm, not realizing just how ugly Londoners become at rush hour. I barely made it out of that train in one piece, though I did mutter "bugger" under my breath a couple times to show them not to mess with Canadians. Yeah.
This past week has been full of V-Day stuff, I'm happy to report the poetry night was not a disaster and people keep telling me how great it was, though that's probably just because they knew I was so nervous about it. About half the poets didn't show up, but I convinced/coerced a couple friends into reading and did some improv stand up comedy in between sets (no, I didn't- I thought about it, though). We raised quite a bit of money for the local woman's shelter, so that's the important thing. The Reclaim the Night march the next day did not go well as it was really cold out, and only 10 of us showed up, so we marched up Queen street and reclaimed a pub. The night did result in some interesting conversations, so not all was lost. I ushered for the Vagina Monologues last night and was really impressed with the show, previously in the week there had been bickering amongst the production and cast so it seemed to have all turned out ok in the end. I figure I've earned enough feminist brownie points to last me a while, at least until International Woman's Day.
I got home really late last night because after the VMs there was a "post graduate party" which was someone's idea to get the postgrad students from all the departments to interact with each other. I went mostly because I knew one of the organizers and there was rumoured to be free food. The food turned out to be some pathetic bowls of chips and the students rather predictably stood around in little huddles according to department, the poor organizers had not really taken into account how anti-social grad students are by nature and how most of us are too weird to interact with people outside our area of study anyway. None the less, I had fun with the other English students making fun of the students from other departments (being the mature bunch that we are) and ended up coming home with 7 hours until I had to catch my train to London. I was not happy to get up this morning. Blech. I'm also very aware that 3 out of my 5 flatmates have gotten ill in the last week, not to mention several other student Brightonians, so I feel like I should take some preemptive measures and try to go to bed before 3 in the morning.
Both my professors have given me a thumbs up for my term paper topics (they also both repeated the phrase "that's very interesting" constantly, which unnerves me a little) so the term paper craziness is about to begin. At least I won't have Christmas in the middle of it this time. Damn all that merriment.
Ok, I think I've decided this night's a gonner. But maybe I'll make it up by reading something 19th century-ish to ease the guilt.
Keep warm in that cold cold country of yours, suckers!- Ahem- friends!

Like sands through the hourglass...

2006-02-24T22:07:00.000Z

These are the days of reading headaches followed by minor accomplishments. I have been researching my ass off, to the point where I feel it should be considered an Olympic sport. Like the triathlon, except nothing gets shot (just harassed to extremes). I'm still trying to juggle all these conference and term papers and well as the ever-looming thesis, determined to make them all somehow brilliantly connected but importantly not the exact same thing, for which I would get in trouble. I haven't actually met with any of my professors about them, as they've been suspiciously evasive (perhaps in the staff room they all call me "that crazy Canadian") and are apparently going on strike next week, so I have to track them down before then. This also seems to be the plan of every other grad student, as we are all rather unusually turning up for our tutor's office hours at once. Today I was contacting by a PhD student from the University of Bradford (which I have never heard of but pretended I had) who did his thesis on almost the exact same thing my conference paper is on, so I have mixed feeling about that. But it is cool to find someone else who has the same rather off-the-beaten-track interest you do. I hope to pick his brains to the best of my ability.

I'm making another trip up to the British Library next week and I'm looking forward to it- I'll have to plan my book selection a little better this time. Last time I ordered a little too many books and almost passed out due to inhalation of periodical dust. It's all about pacing. They also don't let you bring food or drinks into the reading rooms, so I'll have to nourish myself before entering. It's like preparing for battle, really.
Mostly I've been kept busy this week with V-Day stuff, we had our club night last night which I think went well, it seemed most of the people there were friends of the band, and mostly male, which was unexpected. Our "Reclaim the Night" (the UK version of Take Back the Night) is tomorrow, so hopefully it doesn't rain. Then once the poetry night on Monday is over I can relax a little.

It's still pretty rainy and chilly here, and I was more than a little bewildered to find that the British consider weather like this a drought. I can deal with extremes in temperature but not extremes in moisture- that's the Albertan in me, I suppose. Oh, and yesterday under the watchful eye of my flatmate I made my first curry. The potatoes were a little mushier than they were supposed to be, but I was quite proud of myself, being stuck for so long in the "pasta and rice" rut.

Yesterday I was petrified to find that on going next door for milk and cookies I was met face to face with none other than the Jesus Army (who else?). I couldn't recall having broken any of the ten commandments, at least not by 10 in the morning, so I slunk by unnoticed, however returning a few minutes later to shamelessly take a picture. Who are these people? Why are they outside my building? Are they going to capture me for experiments? (I guess at the worst they would perform miracles on me. Can't be that bad). Anyway, this may be the last you hear of me.

And despite the fact that I whine so much about being busy, I find time for quite a bit of quality internet surfing. A friend of a friend of mine has this great blog called Mind the Gap and she's put together a Carnival of Feminists, which has all sorts of good links that can offer you a good few hours of quality procrastination.

Stay tuned for the next episode. What will she do next? (and don't say talk about books- I may be unpredictable. You never know)

Pastoral and Rainy

2006-02-20T17:09:00.000Z

Well I went from having an extremely busy week to having a pastoral weekend, and now back to a busy week. Wednesday after London I found out my paper had been accepted by the conference committee-yay!- which means I now have something on my resume besides two rather generic degrees, but also means I have to find time to actually write the paper. I also have to find something to wear, not owning anything that says "academic chic." I haven't had time yet to do any of these things, as I had to prepare for my presentation today on Dracula and my presentation tomorrow on The Picture of Dorian Gray. My presentation today went as expected: someone cried, someone got angry, and someone offered unexpected praise. Just another day in a Victorian sexualities seminar. Friday Katie and I went shopping for supplies for V-Day events, including art materials for a vagina painting workshop. Shopping while being fully funded is really enjoyable. Last week I finally heard back from my HOST family (HOST is this program the university does where it matches lonely international students up with Sussex alumni) who I contacted in December and thought they didn't like me because they never emailed me back. Because of this delay I reapplied and got a second HOST person, who also contacted me this week. The long and short of it was that I did the blatantly dishonest thing and accepting outings with both families last weekend, taking care not to mention them to each other. Saturday Eva and Sue, an incredibly friendly couple who did their Masters in Sussex in the 70's, took me to the most idyllic village that could possibly exist. Afriston consists of sheep, pubs, tea houses, a gigantic old church and a little river with a white bridge over it, where I'm sure Mr Darcy proposed to Elizabeth. I had my first "cream tea", which contrary to my former expectations is not an actual tea but a complicated meal involving layering things on scones. It was raining, which made the drive up all the more pretty, with misty views of the White Cliffs of not-quite-but-pretty-close-to Dover. Sunday Jan took me and one other student, Shruti, to another village, Crossing Hands. We went to a fancy pub where the only vegetarian thing they had on the menu was a big block of goat's cheese. Having thoroughly enjoyed my "bitter" and cheese, we drove up (in the rain of course) to see Bodiam Castle, my very first castle experience. Despite the moist cold that had sunk in to my bones by this point, I experienced the sublime feeling of exploring a space over 700 years older than I am. Shruti and I had a good laugh over the educational video that was very "Canadian Heritage Moment" but with even worse costumes. Apparently the castle was never invaded, so it was in pretty good condition, we walked up the original staircases and everything (how medieval stair-climbers did not wipe out on those staircases on a daily basis I cannot comprehend). I can't image life in a drafty castle miles from nowhere. I'll upload more photos onto Filckr soon. I downloaded Google Earth yesterday and can now spy on many of your homes, just so you know. None of those "thank god Jen's out of the country" parties. Anyway, back to presentation preparation and term paper brainstorming (aka "idea inventing"). Happy Family Day.

Libraries are romantic in their own way

2006-02-14T23:40:00.000Z

Ug. So tired. Last week was too productive so the following week must now be lethargic to compensate. I think it mostly has to do with the two hour bus ride up and back from London, with seven hours of researching dusty periodicals in between. Interesting, but not particularly energizing. It was good to "get my hands dirty" (literally, in some cases) with primary research and feel like a real academic, having finally figured out the British Library system and all. I also feel a little like a spinster in the making, hunched over my research with my big reading glasses on Valentine's Day. I considered making a sign saying "I do have a boyfriend in Canada! And I can clean up pretty!" and taping it to my laptop, but as I was just about the only one in the reading room anyway it would not have improved matters. I did find out some interesting stuff about late 19th century vegetarianism and the various unique individuals (being a euphemism for crazy) who were involved in it. Apparently being a vegetarian alleviates the need for liquids, increases your sex drive, makes you less likely to be a murderer, prevents babies from crying, helps you interact with "savages" and of course gets you in the pocket of the big guy upstairs. I was also excited to find they had an exhibit on Elizabeth Barrett Browning on display. I thought they idealized her relationship with Robert Browning just a little too much (being that the exhibit strangely coincided with Valentine's Day) but was overall really interesting. So now I have all these piles of research done for a paper I'm still not sure if I'm presenting- I better get to read this paper somewhere. If that means crashing the graduate colloquium, so be it. Just give me soapbox and I'll take it from there.
I did so much reading this weekend that I think I finally may have found a thesis topic, but I'm not telling anyone yet in case someone spoils the idea. Yes, that's a little crazy, but hey, I'm a vegetarian.
Happy Hallmark/Christian Martyrdom Holiday. Can't wait till chocolate goes on sale tomorrow! Goodbye skinny jeans.

The Defeat of Shiny Objects

2006-02-08T23:16:00.000Z

I feel like this week I have reached the level of productivity I have always know I was capable of when I am not so distracted by shiny objects, pretty architecture, nice weather, and other assorted thing. Really, I wish you guys were here to witness this flurry of work ethic, now it'll just become a myth when I leave (there once was a postgraduate student who haunted these halls, sometimes you can still see her running haphazardly around while balancing books in awkward positions...). This week I'm preparing for two presentations, two upcoming term papers, the unavoidable thesis abstract, and a conference paper. And that is only academic stuff. I'm also organizing the V-Day poetry reading, editing and writing for the second edition of the zine, and trying to be supportive to a friend who has a horrible horrible boyfriend. I still have the newest Jeanette Winterson novel given to me at Christmas sitting on my shelf totally unopened, which watches me while I do dry, unsexy research. Not that I'm complaining, I would just like to keep a record of this week for the next time I spend an entire day in bed with an Atwood novel I have already read five times. This week will justify future laziness. Anyway, the highlight of my week was a collective book launch put on by the English department to celebrate all the books that had been published by faculty this year. All the grad students were invited and most of us showed up upon being told there was free food and wine. We had to navigate conversations in a manner which did not disclose that none of us knew the titles of the books being launched, let alone had read them. However, the awkwardness dissolved as the wine flowed and I had a very special moment when one of my favorite tutors exclaimed "I am soooo pissed!" and proceeded to hug me. Then another greatly admired tutor struck up a conversation with me about the maritime provinces and how glad he was that I'm Canadian (I used the smile and nod technique). I was thrilled to see all my fellow 19th century MA's so relaxed, I really think we should start drinking wine during seminars. The conversation would loosen up quite a bit and apparently my tutors love me when they're drunk. Today I did some vampire research, the some potential thesis topic research, and then went to my self-defense class in which we got to use pads to practice on, so that was great. Then I went to see someone give a paper on the anti-Modernists (who apparently were modernists would didn't like other modernists- kind of an amusing concept) that lasted for two hours. This guy could talk. I got my paper marks back and they were not as good as I was hoping, but not low enough to fling myself off the pier. The comments were a little vague so I'm trying to chase down my tutors get talk about my papers with, as I didn't really feel I could bring it up when they looked so happy and uninhibited at the book launch.
Tomorrow I'm doing contract work for the University auditing classrooms. When I did it in October I ran out of reading material, so this time around I'm hoping to make the most out of being paid to do very little by getting a weeks worth of reading done. I'm going to have to miss the Victorian Lit seminar, so I'll have to go for a week without drilling the PhD students for advice. I'm sure they'll be somewhat relieved.
Well as I have to get up at 7 tomorrow (ghastly) I wish you all a good weekend.

Groundhog Day: World Releases Bated Breath

2006-02-02T16:19:00.000Z

Hello everybody. Happy February, month of Valentine's Day, warmer-than-January weather, and according to my Canadian themed calendar, elk. This year is already going by way too fast- I'm only here for 8 more months! Crazy. This week has felt a little like the calm before the storm. I'm waiting for my term papers grades and have no nails whatsoever left to bite with anxiety-fueled impatience. I'm a bit nervous about the results, I've never written a graduate paper before and don't really know what to expect. I can't get out of my head the first welcome speech they gave us in which the director of Humanities said "Don't expect As. Cs aren't too bad- Cs are satisfactory. Expect Cs." I also submitted my very first conference paper proposal (exempting the farce that was my undergraduate honors colloquium *sigh*) on the influence of popular 19th century writers on the early vegetarian movement. I've had some good feedback from my PhD friends, but these are the people that can talk about the role of pocketwatches in the Victorian novel for hours. I kid you not. This topic is also a great reason to go up to the British Library, where they have original copies of the Vegetarian Society's meeting minutes. I booked myself a bus ticket on Feb 14th and will probably buy chocolate to eat on the way. Happy Valentines Day to me. Also I have to start thinking about my topics for this term's papers (apparently students don't get a 'recovery period') as my profs actually want a formal abstract and bibliography this time round. I have to give presentations in the next couple weeks, too, but I can blab on for 5-10 minutes pretty easily.
On Tuesday Kristen and I went to see her friend play some jazz in a club right out of 50's, with dark mood lighting, little holes of light in the wall replicating stars, lots of smoke, and guys wearing artistic hats. I drank the strongest long island ice tea I've ever had in my life and ended up talking to the drummer about British music, an inspiring conversation in which I learned that Van Morrison was Irish-who knew! Yesterday I had the second lesson of my self-defense course, which left me feeling sore but also really like hitting something- fortunately no one rubbed me the wrong way on the trip home. Tonight I'm off to meet my Victorian postgrad friends, even though there's no seminar today we decided to go for drinks anyway. I think there's a long island ice tea calling my name (saying "Jennnn... Van Morrisson is Irrisssh..."). Unfortunately they want to meet at a pub up by the train station, which I'm pretty sure is haunted (ok, so I think all British buildings are haunted- but they probably are!) so I'll have to cajole someone into walking home with me.
Looks like you guys are in for a short winter, the weather here is still a mystery as they don't have Groundhog Day, and when I tried to explain it to a British native they concluded all North Americans are obviously insane:

"So everyone gathers around and watches this little animal-"
"What, like a ferret?"
"No, a groundhog. It's like a guinea pig or something. Anyway, if it sees its shadow then winter will be longer so it goes back into its burrow, or maybe it's the other way around..."
"So like the rodent thing is psychic?"
"No, no. Never mind. The groundhog does not need to explain itself. It just is."

Amen.

In the words of good old Matthew Arnold:

2006-01-28T20:52:00.000Z

“Oxford whispering from her towers the last enchantments of the Middle Age . . . Home of lost causes, and forsaken beliefs, and unpopular names, and impossible loyalties!”

I am exhausted! Nature did not intend for tourism of entire cities to take place in six hours. It's unnatural. None the less I am totally on an Oxford high- I have never seen such a beautiful place. I woke up early this morning, arrived at the Sussex campus to catch the bus, and found...
snow? Yes, indeed it was much colder than the BBC website told me it would be and I was wearing a hoodie. Oh well, I was too tired to care really. The trip was a surreal, I had much more coffee and much less sleep in my system than usual, but also had the feeling I was traveling back in time. I left an urban, flashy Brighton and arrived in a Thomas Hardy novel. I tripped on the way out of the bus so apparently I'm klutzy in all space/time vortexes. Our ensuing guided tour would have been great if not for the piercing winds. The guide took us around all the colleges, the most impressive being
Christ College, past home of Lewis Carroll (and some other people who I'm sure are also important). This picture is just of the residences, we also got to look at the courtyard (aka the quad) and the cathedral. I saw some people scuttling around in their academic garb and was tickled pink. It's a really beautiful building with security guards "looking out for the students" (this is the difference between Oxford and everywhere else- they actually care about the well-being of their students, as in they would prefer them to stay alive).

The cathedral was also breathtaking, with all sorts of curious stained glass. My favorite was a tribute to Saint Frideswide, done by William Morris who decided the depiction of the saint's death would be a good place to stick a pink version of the newly-invented lavatory (in the top right corner behind the red curtain):

After looking at a few more colleges we were set loose on the city, and I headed to the infamous Eagle and Child pub where C.S. Lewis and J.R.R. Tolkien held their literary discussion group, delightfully named "the Inklings." Across the street is the Lamb and Flag pub, where Thomas Hardy reportedly liked to hang out and wrote most of Jude the Obscure. I was feeling like I could relate to Jude a little with my slight envy of Oxford scholars, so I popped in there but couldn't get a seat which only increased my Jude-like despair.
Next I made for Blackwell's Bookshop, which every other bibliophile I've met has recommended to me. This place is amazing, I have found my mothership (apologies to all McNally Robinson faithfuls- but seriously, if you saw this place you would be a Jesus kissin' Judas in no time). Four floors of books three miles wide, including a coffee shop, rare books department, and second hand section. I was overwhelmed and didn't even know where to start. In an hour I could barely make it through the poetry section. After Blackwell's I headed back in the same direction I came from (true to form I was completely lost the whole trip) to do a blitzkrieg look at the Ashmolean Museum, the oldest museum in Britain. I really enjoyed the exhibits, however was disappointed to find everything stopped at the 18th century and there wasn't a Pre-Raphaelite to be found. I was intrigued by the Greek and Roman sculptures, which I've probably seen a million times in text books but look much more alive in person. They also had an exhibit of Egyptian art with lots of burial remains and artifacts. I resisted temptation at the gift shop (well, I bought a postcard but that doesn't count) a then realized there was something I hadn't done- find the cemeteries! I noticed St.John's Church (by the pubs I had been at earlier) which was not open to the public, but under the bewildered eye of a nice bobbie I dangled myself over the fence without ever actually touching the other side and tried to read the inscriptions, they were all moss covered and weatherbeaten- I think some of them might have been 17th century! I went up to St.Giles, a really noticeable gothic Church with a public cemetery that was beautiful- big weeping willow trees and everything. Someone else was there eating lunch and taking pictures, so I felt comfortingly less weird. By this point I was cold as in serious limbs-going-numb-Canadian-cold, and the bus was going to leave in an hour, but I had one last stop I had to make...

Alice's Shop! A really endearing little store with everything Lewis Carroll themed. I did not even try to resist temptation and came out with a great turquoise Through the Looking Glass bookbag and a little folio of the original John Tenniel illustrations. By this time I had to be back at the bus in 15 minutes, so I started walking briskly in what I was positive was the right direction... anyway, skipping over the anxious moments that followed I made the bus and was shipped back to the 21st century. Good thing I have my bookbag or I would have thought it all a dream. It does make a kind of funny story, running out of a Lewis Carroll shop saying "I'm late! I'm late!"

Alrighty. Soon there will be more pictures on Flickr to look at- I took a lot of pictures. Did I mention I love my camera? I loooove my camera. Now I have to get back to the difficult task of writing an interesting abstract for a conference paper for which I haven't really decided the topic. Whatever it is I think it should involve doing research in Oxford...totally.

Oh Canada...

2006-01-24T11:53:00.000Z

STEPHEN HARPER? STEPHEN HARPER???

The same Stephen Harper who shares thoughts such as:

"You've got to remember that west of Winnipeg the ridings the Liberals hold are dominated by people who are either recent Asian immigrants or recent migrants from eastern Canada: people who live in ghettoes and who are not integrated into western Canadian society." (Stephen Harper, Report Newsmagazine, January 22, 2001)

and

I don't know all the facts on Iraq, but I think we should work closely with the Americans.” (Report Newsmagazine, March 25 2002)

Well, good luck to you all. After a year of having to deal with Blair's labour goverment I think I might just immigrate to Sweden. Hallå och adjö!

Neglected blog!

2006-01-20T18:07:00.000Z

I haven't really been ignoring you, I promise! This week has been the first real week of classes, meetings and lots and lots of using my brain. The first days of both my classes went well, despite the fact that our professor totally expected us all to have read and thought intelligently about the course material when we had just handed in papers hours ago. My Monday class, 19th Century Sexuality, is taught by Dr.Quinn. We get to read Oscar Wilde and Bram Stoker, which is great, but his course seems to largely center on gay men. I pointed out the rather large omission of the other sex several times in class, so I think I've successfully established myself as "the raving feminist from Canada." My other class, Literature at the Fin de Siecle is taught by Dr. Taylor, who has edited every important Vic Lit anthology, knows everything, and completely intimidates me. She's actually a very nice person, I just scare easily. We're having some problems organizing V-Day stuff and because I'm insane I've also agreed to write an article for a campus-run magazine, the Pulse. I have to read two novels and some theory by Tuesday, but one of the novels is Sense and Sensibility so I can't really complain. I got to see all my fellow 19th C. MA students for the first time since we finished class last month, just about all of us are in Dr.Taylor's class. I am determined to get them to drink beer with me at least once this semester.
Let's see, I cleaned my room yesterday, a chore which has been neglected pretty much since I got back. After vacuuming and returning all the library books I had out for my papers my room looks great.
Today I went to a meeting for the Pulse, then met Julia at the library, which is in the Pavilion buildings, and she walked me through the fancy dress exhibit which was donated by a family and consisted of about a century of this family's clothing. It was a learning experience of the best kind. And, Julia wrote one of the pamphlets about hats they had for public use, so I was in the presence of a pamphlet celebrity. After the museum we wandered around Kemptown, a trendy area I has only visited for the Post Office, and found some great antique shops, including the one rather mysterious, unnamed costume shop in which I bought a broach:

Julia bought something that was once alive but is now decorative and named "Daphne." We hung out at a cafe in a very nice bookstore and relieved some of our grad student angst, then I came home to read but instead appear to be writing in my blog.
Oh yes, and today the sun came out! I couldn't believe it either, so I took a picture:

Well I have to go read. Have to have to have to.

Will write again soon, I promise!

Friday the 13th is fantastic! The movie was all wrong!

2006-01-13T18:09:00.000Z

Well I have to say, considering I have two huge papers due on Monday which could determine the outcome of my academic career, I am in a great mood. Largely because I am finished them and have time left to do some "polishing," which is a euphemism for fixing all my trademark grammatical mistakes. I'm still not sure how I feel about the papers- I think I started thinking about my papers too early and after months of pondering their subtle nuances I have no way of looking at them objectively. Does that make sense? First of Jen's bad grammatical trademarks: long wordy sentences.
Anyway, the semester's back in swing and though my classes don't start until next week I've had to chance to go to a seminar group and attend some meetings. The seminar group was great- I've discovered that while the Victorian MA students aren't really that social the PhD students are a riot. The seminar lasted about thirty minutes and the post-seminar drinking lasted about three hours. It was so fun. Apparently I had met some of them at the Hallowe'en party (remember, the "Jen Gets Social" episode?) but was probably "Hallowe'ening" a little too much at the time and have no such recollection.
I've also met some of the women's group members and we're already sending out CFPs for Aphromighty 2. We're also putting on a production of the Vagina Monologues this term and I'm helping with the V-Day Campaign. I sense there might be a poetry reading involved.
I've also signed up for a trip to Oxford, organized by the Sussex International Students Office. It doesn't happen until the 28th, but it gives me a little adventure to look forward to. Oxford! Home of Matthew Arnold, Walter Pater, Oscar Wilde, and institutionalised patriarchy! Can't wait. I can flex the muscles of my new camera.
I have also discovered you can download TV shows off Limewire, not just pirated music. So I have like 10 episodes of Gilmore Girls waiting for me to finish these stupid papers. Awww, they're not stupid. We just have a bit of a love/hate relationship.
Oh yes, and the last happiness-inducing thing is that I've downloaded the official Jeopardy game and aside from the proliferation of American questions, am loving it. My sister and I share special memories of long competitive nights playing a 1990's version of this game. This is what we did pre-internet.
Anyway, sending good vibes your way. Friday the 13th seems ok so far over here!

PS- Still no sun. Am pining away for Vitamin D. Doesn't help to be reading Dracula.

A brief emotional inventory

2006-01-09T02:19:00.000Z

Potential reasons for feeling melancholic:

1) I just finished writing an essay on the work of Melanie Klein, Sylvia Plath and Christina Rossetti, whose works being studied are titled respectively: "the Death Instinct and Schizoid Mechanisms", "Death and Co.", and "After Death."
2) In order to cure my writer's block and satiate my interest in things British and creepy I visited Brighton's oldest cemetery on Saturday.
3) Within a week I watched the entire fourth season of Six Feet Under.
4) Post-Christmas depression .
5) Generic grad-school "what-am-I-doing-with-my-life" depression
6) No one considers Bush a criminal but this mouse is a menace to society
7) THE SUN NEVER COMES OUT IN THIS COUNTRY. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD.

Now that I think about it, why I'm not really melancholic:

1) I've just discovered the little "link" button on my Blogger toolbar, so that's brightened my day a little.
2) I had a great moment when researching the Victorian erotic writer Henry Spencer Ashbee who called sex "firky-toodling." Fantastic.
3) I've discovered who the milk thief in my flat is and he bashfully apologized this morning.
4) I have for all intents and purposes finishing the writing portion of my essays and can cease banging my head against things. Nothing says "think positive" like an unbruised forehead.

Term Paper Head

2006-01-05T01:26:00.000Z

***edit*** My sister is on the cover of the Calgary Herald! And I'm missing all the excitement. But check it out, it's a pretty good article. And don't forget to vote! : http://www.canada.com/calgaryherald/news/story.html?id=476e7608-56c0-44fd-ae7f-c1dbce3712c6&k=73152&p=1

************************************************

Term Paper Head is a condition resulting from reading too much, taking notes which are later found to be indecipherable, forgetting what you just read, banging your head against hard objects, then beginning the process all over again. It results in whininess and extreme procrastination.

So, as you may have guessed, the paper writing isn't going so well today. Yesterday and the day before- great! Today- totally useless! I feel like I need to do more research, but the more I do the harder I find it to write. The University library was open today for the first time since I've gotten back, so I think I over-did it a little with checking out any books that in any way related to my essay topic. I got too excited after realizing with all the books I returned last semester that meant I had 13 books left until my 20 book limit! So I took out, yes, 13 books. I am insane.

So anyway, it's been a week back here and I'm starting to adjust to my parallel life. I'm still jet lagged, but I haven't exactly been enforcing a strict sleep schedule. Sleep when sleepy, wake up when not sleepy, forage for food two to three times a day, go to bathroom when.... well, you get the idea.

I started reading Dracula last night (totally class related) and had nightmares, then woke up to find the city covered in an eerie mist. It was pretty cool, I tried to take some pictures but they would have just turned out...gray. I have to say I missed the picturesque-ness of Brighton. It's much harder to feel romantic and tortured in Calgary.

After these papers are due on the 16th I'm going to go on an adventure somewhere without my laptop and no one around me will be allowed to say the words "psychoanalysis," "aestheticism," "literature" or "essay." And just as a precautionary measure, no one is ever allowed to say the word "thesis" at any point. I am trying my best not to think about it and would appreciate your cooperation.

Please send medication.
Love Jen

Hellloooo 2006

2006-01-01T17:17:00.000Z

As it seems to be the blogger thing to do, here is, to the best of my knowledge, my

Year in Review

I had a mini-mental breakdown applying for grad schools
I completed an honours thesis and for months could only speak in lines from Emily Dickinson poems

I finished an undergraduate degree

I became disillusioned with the U of C English department and in a not unrelated turn of events formed strong opinions about postmodernism
I made friends with a professor for the first time
I celebrated the two year anniversary of a great relationship, thus breaking my personal record of a year and a half
I experienced the complications of being a daughter of divorced parents
I connected with new friends in wonderfully random and coincidental ways
I became even closer to old friends
For the first time someone close to me had a baby
I got accepted to grad school and had whatever the opposite of a mini-break down is
I won a non-generic Scholarship
I moved to England and had to say goodbye to good friends and family
I visited London and fell in love with it
I lived in a dormitory for the first time
I am unemployed for the first time since I was 13
I edited a zine
I experienced being a cultural minority
After a long difficult battle I learned how to use MSN

Happy New Year everyone!

Sweet Home Calgary

2005-12-27T07:16:00.000Z

So I came all the way down here for a white Canadian Christmas and +11 is the best Calgary can offer? I'm disappointed. I was expecting frost-bite, icicles-on-eyelashes, hair-frozen-stiff kind of weather. But I forgive you, you crazy unpredictable country you. And I apologize to all of you for the inevitable horrible weather that will occur after I leave, spurred on by my previous comment.
I had a spectacular Christmas and birthday and am happy to report I got done 1/4 the work I had planned on doing- not great, really, but as much as I could expect from myself. Made two nostalgic trips back to the old U of C library, which is actually looking not too shabby compared to the chaos that is U of S cataloging. I am now the proud owner of a U of C Alumni card, which gets me a fancy pin and a newsletter. This, more than turning 22, makes me feel old. Why can't I be called "post- U of C" or "since graduated (kind of)"? Alumni. Sounds like a messianic cult. I had a pleasant surprise today, I happily flipped open my new copy of Eats, Shoots and Leaves to find, according to the dust jacket, Lynne Truss lives in sunny Brighton. She also mentions in the introduction that she wrote a graphic novel about Lewis Carroll. I must find this woman. If any has any information about this author's whereabouts, please contact our 24 hour hotline.
And in even more exciting news, from someone who is my new favorite relative, hell, new favorite person, I received my very own digital camera. No more being forced to take bad pictures and get them developed for ridiculous prices! No more making up excuses about putting pictures on the net because I'm too lazy to go to the store and get them put on CD! There are so many pictures to come, as soon as the month changes as I've over-used my uploading capacity on Flickr. You'll have to start begging me to make them stop. "No more pictures, for the love of god!..."
I frickin' love the holidays.

A heroic shot of our tiny, synthetic tree.

A non-British post

2005-12-22T22:57:00.000Z

I've missed blogging but feel it's a little moot as I'm in the same city as most of you. It's not really as fun to talk about the weather and cultural quirks of Calgary. All though I have noticed people seem to walk really fast here- is that new? Is it part of Oprah's new exercise tips? Oh well. Have a Merry Christmas everyone. It was great to see so many of you again!

I'm not sure why I find this so funny...

2005-12-07T15:28:00.000Z

Quote from today's Calgary Herald online:

"When Shaun Downey discovered a purse in the back seat of his car, he didn't think of spending the $1,500, charging up the credit cards and keeping the digital camera. Instead, he thought about God."

Who must have been the rightful owner of the purse- how else would it inexplicably appear in his car? We now have proof God is a woman.

Alright, back to your regularly scheduled program.

Show me love!

2005-12-03T17:37:00.000Z

I've finally got around to putting more pictures up on Flickr. So certain people out there (you know who you are) can stop harassing me and let me enjoy the holiday season.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/janeeyreinbrighton/

I'll be home for Christmas, you can count on me.... I'll be hooooome for Chriiiistmasss, if only in my dreams.....

Christmas and the Id

2005-12-01T21:04:00.000Z

Hello! Only 10 more days until I return to wreak havoc in Calgary again! I'm getting all excited about Xmas. My flatmate Jill bought a tiny Charlie Brown Xmas tree and we all decorated it yesterday, which took about 2 minutes because it was tiny and we only had improvised ornaments (paperclips, hair pins...). I have to start thinking about Xmas shopping- if anyone has any England-specific things you'd like me to look for, let me know.
I spent today wandering around in the wind trying to pay my phone bill, which was much more of a complicated affair than expected. I rewarded my hard work with allowing myself some quiet time in a coffee shop with my newest totally non-school related book. Three hours and almost an entire novel later, I wandered back outside and walked back home along the seafront. Back home I was in a creative mood, so I sat down to finish reading Freud and got distracted by nagging thoughts about humour and the lack of it in psychoanalysis. So then I sat down and ranted to my journal about humour and academia and phallocentrism. As usual, I imagined my rantings turning into an highly acclaimed essay, maybe titled "Penises and You: Why Jen Thinks Freud Should be Funnier." Wouldn't you read that? I totally would.
This has actually been a very stimulating week, on Monday I saw Harry Potter with Julia, who patiently explained the subtle nuances of the plot for my optimum viewing experience. Tuesday I went to a talk at the university about the photography of Lewis Carroll, which was great but attended almost exclusivly by faculty. I spotted my classmate Angela and we clung together and tried to deflect attention from ourselves. I really should have mingled more, but there's nothing more awkward then talking to your professor in a completely social context. What am I supposed to say? Nice tie? At least I didn't ask where the washrooms are (I know at least some of you get that reference!). Anyway, Wednesday I embarked on reading Jude the Obscure purely for purposes of impressing my professor, not that I didn't enjoy reading it. I think Thomas Hardy is actually one of my favorite novelists. Shame about the poetry. Kidding, kidding.
So we're having another election! It's the talk of my residence, which is highly populated by Canadians. The process of absentee voting appears to be typically Canadian, in being based on good intentions but confusingly wrapped up in bureaucracy. I'll do it anyway, just based on principle.
Anyway, back to the wacky adventures of Freud.
Talk to you all soon!

busy busy busy

2005-11-26T00:07:00.000Z

Hi everyone! Two days ago was the 23rd- you know that means. One month until someone has a birthday! I'm telling you this so none of you get any selfish ideas of going away for Xmas. Next month is the month of Jen. And also Jesus, but he does not throw parties as fun as mine, to be frank. But don't tell him I said that.
I can't believe how fast time is going. I've spent the first half of the week working on the Women's Group's zine, the final agreed upon title being "Aphromighty." The end result was great- I'll bring some copies home with me. Unfortunately, the original working collective whittled down to me and Katie when it came down to the hours of folding and stapling, so I am now suffering from paper cuts in odd places and strange urges to collate things.
Then it was American Thanksgiving, which meant Kristen threw a party with pumpkin pie! That was great fun and people kept asking me to say "about." I'm now a little insecure about it and try to use synonyms, such as "in relation to." Yesterday was spend in the annals of the library trying to find books that exist but only in the matrix of the library catalogue. "Ghost books", as fellow English students have begun to call them. Today I went to class, back to the library, and then over to Kristen's again to watch a great documentary on the psychoanalysis of Hitler. We wondered if we could pass it off as a paper for our class. Then we played with her vampiric hamster aptly named Mr. Jingles. He only drew blood from me once, which apparently means he likes me.
I was really cold on the walk home, I think it hailed today. Or someone was throwing tiny pieces of something at our building. Either way, I have had to grudgingly pull out my winter coat.
Arrgg, I have library dust in my hair. I think I need a bath.
A demain. Same bat time, same bat channel.

the opposite of Manic Monday- Sluggish Sunday?

2005-11-20T21:36:00.000Z

Another week, my goodness. Where does the time go? This is especially pertinent to today as I've done absolutely nothing productive all day, unless you count ordering a book off amazon.co.uk which was incredibly strenuous, as you can imagine. By about 2 in the afternoon my laziness forced me to drift out into the hallway in order to find some other effective procrastinating technique. I was thrilled to find two of my flatmates had drifted out of their rooms with similar motivations. We were all wearing t-shirts and pajama pants. We had a great time discussing various things, and by the time a fourth flatmate had joined us the sun was going down (at 3:30! Insanity!). We all decided to walk down to the beach to watch the sunset over the water, which is just about the prettiest sight in the world (see photos). After it started to get cold and the seagulls were conglomerating around us making us uneasy with their carnivorous looks, we went inside and made tea. We then watched a game show about selling antiques (only in England) and eventually drifted back to our rooms. I fiddled with my hotmail, which kept crashing on me for some reason, and eventually fixed not only my hotmail but my MSN started mysteriously working. Yay! I chatted with Kelsey for a bit, and then I did some work- just kidding! I wrote some postcards and browsed around the British Library online catalogue. I've got a serious case of Sunday laziness. It's really warm in our flat, too, which makes it worse I think.
I've also decided today I miss my guitar. There's someone in another flat who I can hear drumming every once and a while. Think of how cool it would be to start a procrastinating-though-music group! See- I may not be actually doing anything but I come up with ideas all the time.
Maybe I should vacuum......

So many books...can't escape...

2005-11-11T22:05:00.000Z

I have to say, being a graduate student leaves you with the most bizarre sense of time. Left to my own devices it seems I'll sleep in until about 10 and stay up reading until my eyes dry out. The fact that it gets dark here now about 4:30 makes the whole situation even more surreal. I've been doing reading on Plath for about the last 3 hours, and was going to take a break by doing reading for my other class, but I don't think my eyes will allow it. I swear I'm going to have bifocals by the time I'm 30. My obligatory non-school related reading this week has been the last novel by Isabelle Allende I haven't read, "Of Love and Shadows." It's beautiful but too short, I'm going to finish it by tomorrow and then be forced to do solely course related reading.
Anyway, this week I did some more work on the zine, for which we haven't gotten any submissions so it looks like I'll have to write some articles. Mostly I've been trying to figure out what the heck I'm going to write my papers on, so when I get to Calgary I can hit the ground running- slowly, as I'll be carrying lots of book.
On Wednesday I went home with Jo and Sophie, two girls from the University I get along quite well with. They share a kind of tiny, many-leveled flat that I'm beginning to recognize as typical British lodgings. We made vegetarian chile and drank "barley cup" (the most tasty hot drink in the world) and they patiently explained contemporary British politics to me. Then we all watched Blair get his ass kicked (metaphorically) on TV and booed and/or cheered accordingly.
Julia and I went out for "coffee" yesterday- by which I mean we went to the first coffee-shop looking place we could decide on and neither of us ordered coffee- and had a great time talking about 19th century culture, applying for PhDs, and the complicated seduction of Stephen Fry- which involves stationary and feather boas, among other things.
Afterwards I went home and relieved myself of the ridiculous amount of books I was carrying around, admired the growing backpack grooves in my shoulders, and then read blogs for a few hours.
Today has been almost completely a work day, unusual for me. I admit it occurred largely because it was raining and windy outside. Typically I use the excuse of going for fresh air to wander along the beach thinking vague thoughts about my work that I promptly forget to write down when I get back. Today I only ventured out to get milk, as someone seems to mistake my milk for theirs on a continual basis. Grrr, milk robbers- the worst kind.
Hope all you Canadian folks are doing well- apparently my boyfriend has replaced me with a cat, so I'm hoping there won't be any confusion when I come home as to who the real Jen is (the real Jen never had a tail! Or did she...).

Au revoir! (I'm hoping to reinforce my Canadian identity by using random French words- more to come!)

---- Image found when googled "Oscar Wilde film" Is totally my next Halloween costume.

"If you are tired of London you're tired of life!"

2005-11-07T20:04:00.000Z

Well, it's been a heck of a week, from trains to rain to periodicals. My London trip was spectacular because it's, well, London! I woke up at 6 am the day of my trip to the harrowing sound of wind whistling through the halls of my residence. I peered out the window and couldn't see anything for all the rain blowing directly towards me. For a minute my ambitions were put to the test, but I eventually got out of bed and lumbered out the door. The bus ride its self was fun, for the parts I was awake for, anyway. Cute countryside houses and picturesque communities on the outskirts of the city abounded. My first trip was to Buckingham Palace, seen from under my umbrella. Very ornate but not nearly as original as I was hoping. I may or may not have seen someone famous, as people were milling about taking pictures of a group of rich looking folks in suits and big hats. And then I almost got run over by a horse cart everyone was cheering at- confused, I wandered towards the more welcoming St James park which was beautiful even in the rain. Swans, geese and squirrels entertained themselves around various monuments built for various royalty. The gates to the park are pretty impressive, and are also inexplicably called "the Canada Gates." I stood with my hand over my heart for a few minutes while some Japanese tourists tried to take pictures of the gate around me. Then I went to see the Parliament Buildings, which were unfortunately under a lot of construction and surrounded by what seemed to be more police than protestors. Things went pretty safely and the few people I talked to were thrilled that I was from Canada. People here seem to have a slightly rose-tinted view of what Canada is like, but I'm too patriotic to correct them. Anyway, I then went literally across the street to Westminster Abbey which was the highlight of the trip. There are no words to describe the presence of that place- of walking amongst thousands of graves. I stood by Milton's grave and was actually allowed to touch Chaucer's. I swear time stopped. Amazing. Once again tourists had to gawk around me as I was a momentarily immobile. They have an entire "Poet's Corner" in which several writer were laid to rest, or if their family forbid doing so they had a monument. I thought Shakespeare's was really well done, making his likeness much more real than you'd expect. The tiles on the floor are all quotes from deceased British writers. Westminster Abbey was the only place I went where photos were not allowed, which is understandable but means I have to recall everything from memory. I wandered into the "Nave" and decided to go for mass in order to get a better look at the amazing decorations.
After the Abbey was the British Library, the library with the largest holdings in the world and which carries at least one edition of anything every published in the UK. Brilliant. I went for the rather over-the-top membership interview ("And what are your intentions here, Miss Burgess?") but didn't have enough time to look at any books because I had to take off for my "literary tour." The tour was somewhat less fun in the rain and not quite as illuminating as I expected, but I did get to see Woolf's and Dickins' houses and drink beer in a pub once owned by Matthew Arnold's father. I spent a large portion of the day trying to figure out the fascinating "tube" system which seemed like one big psychological experiment. What a day!
Yesterday I returned from a conference in Sheffield, which was less of a quintessential country town than I was expecting, although I did get to see some sheep. Some of them had raincoats on-seriously! They were better prepared for the weather than I was. A bunch of friends and I rented a van (mini-bus, as they seem to be called here) for the long journey so that was fun. Then I had to do a presentation today on Victorian gentleman's periodicals which I think went pretty well, even though my professor referred to me as American for the fourth time in the semester. I think next class I'll wear a Canada sticker on my forehead.
Anyway, to say the least I'm exhausted! Tomorrow I'm determined to sleep in. After I watch the BBC remake of Much Ado About Nothing, cleverly titled "ShakespeaRE-told" in the TV guide.
Cheerio!

"I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read in the train"

2005-11-01T20:10:00.000Z

London tomorrow!!! I am so excited I conveniently can't do any school work. But what book to bring? I feel like I should read a Londoner in London, but I just got a new book about Sylvia that I'm dying to read- there's always good old Stephen Fry, but I'm all little mad at him after googling (how quickly that has become a verb- must be a record) his name and discovering he was in the 1997 classic Spice World. So we're spending some time apart.
Maybe Virginia? There's always Oscar.
Anyway, I can't wait! It's going to rain tomorrow, which actually might provide a more authentic atmosphere and means there will be less line ups (queues, I should say).

On a total segway, I've also discovered that Turner (yes, thee Turner!) painted Brighton Pier years ago:

Pretty cool. I'm not in it, unfortunately. :)

Well, stay tuned for photos!!!

Feeling Just Lovely!

2005-10-29T11:48:00.000+01:00

Well it's another rainy day here on the coast. I think I'll have to call off the seach for the perfect raincoat and just buy the next one I see. It's still not really cold here, though, which is nice. Just wet and windy. I sat up all night watching and interview with Stephen Fry and thoroughly enjoyed every minute of it. He's so witty. And the interviewer looked just a little like Eric Idle- he had the 70's floppy hair. Then I talked to Jay for a bit and went to bed realizing I had done none of the work I'd promised myself I would. I have so much reading to do it's hard to organize a scheduale. I have decided I'm going to write one of my papers on Sylvia Plath, whose work I've wanted to study for a while.
Yesterday I participated in a psychological experiment and made 5 pounds- yes! ( said a la Napoleon Dynamite) I was all prepared to act psychologically unsound, but most of it was just answering yes or no to rather boring questions. I also went over to my friends Kristen's house for our weekly American TV afternoon and made pancakes. My poor American friend was under the illusion that maple syrup is just brown sugar and water- I set her right and represented my country well. Also, yesterday two people told me my accent was "just lovely". I could get used to this.
On Tuesday I visited the University library's special collections, in which I could look at digital images of Virginia Woolf's manuscripts (I was disappointed to find they would let me touch the real ones, but I suppose it's understandable). It was pretty neat to discover she doodled and misspelled things as much as I do. I was amazing to find she wrote out the entire manuscript of "A Room of Ones Own" by hand, which I guess centuries of writers did but still makes me realize how spoiled I am.
I've planned a trip to London next Wednesday. In order to get cheap bus tickets, I have to leave at 7:45 in the the morning and return at 10:00 pm. So I might spend some of the day sleeping on a London bench (cue "Wouldn't it be Loverly" music {from My Fair Lady, you philistines})
Anyway, I've planned to see Buckingham Palace, pop in at a Make Poverty History rally at the Parliament Buildings, get someone to take a picture of me on front of Big Ben, see Westiminister Abbey, and then go on a literary tour of the Bloomsbury area in the evening. There's so much to do in that city- you could live there your entire life and never feel the need to leave. I think I'm going to leave an entirely different day for the museums and libraries, to do them justice.
Well, back to the books!
Ta for now.

This week in the news...

2005-10-21T15:22:00.000+01:00

Well lets see, what's happened since I wrote in here last... Another English student in the Sussex Women's Group and I have decided to start a campus magazine of sorts, containing women related creative stuff. I'm really excited, but we had this idea after drinking a couple beers so it might be one of those "Hey- you know what'd be really cool" moments that seem less realistic in retrospect, and then everyone forgets about it. But I hope not, I feel I could benefit from a non-class related project. I'm all about the projects. I did a presentation in class today that I was really nervous about- psychoanalysis is not my area of expertise. Thankfully, the first day of class when we were picking presentations I nabbed the only 19th c. writer on the reading list, so I was in my element in that sense. The presentation went surprisingly well and the class seemed to get really excited and talkative about my opinions on Charlotte Perkins Gilman (see, why can't you guys be more like that? Kidding-kidding). So basically I said some controversial things and let the class argue about it. It was great. I could totally be a professor. But with good hygiene. No, I don't want to expand on that.
We've been having some trouble with our flat, everyday either the water pipes, the boiler or the electricity shuts down. The night before we take bets on which one it's going to be. Hopefully those problems will get ironed out before it starts to get cold here- we had our first chilly morning today. Well, now that I think about it this might be the first time I've been awake early enough to know if it's chilly...hmmm... But the wind and the waves were so loud last night I kept dreaming I was outside- not fun.
Oh, I went to see Oliver Twist yesterday with Julia (my friend from Calgary). First Pride and Prejudice and now Oliver- two Victorian movies in a row. Lucky me. I really enjoyed it, it's been a while since I read the book so I can't attest to it's literary merits, but the acting was great and we left the movie theatre in an authentic Dickinsian gloom.
I'm starting to have moments where all of a sudden I think "Oh my God, I'm in England! For real!" I think I've been so busy settling in here I haven't yet had time to be excited. But now I totally am. I'm following the politics here and everything. I'm hoping to go to London and maybe sit in on a House of Lords session. Snap a picture of me and Tony.

So I hear it's snowing in Calgary. Apparently it doesn't snow here- what an odd concept. What do parents do with their children in the winter? Hm. I should ask one of the natives.

Clicky Clicky

2005-10-17T13:57:00.000+01:00

I bring you photos!

http://www.flickr.com/photos/janeeyreinbrighton/

This week: Jen Gets Social

2005-10-13T21:01:00.000+01:00

Well hello all of you faithful readers. I have been here over three weeks. Isn't that bizarre? In a sense I kind of feel like I'm living in two worlds- my mind often drifts back to Calgary and my body is still stubbornly refusing to adjust to UK time. I've been reading the Calgary Herald and Globe and Mail website, and admittedly have this sort of narcissistic sadness that the city seems to be carrying on without me...sigh... On the other hand I have this whole new world over here I'm adjusting to slowly and becoming familiar with. It's a very strange feeling. And I have a feeling a piece of me is going to continue to be Calgarian, largely because everyone I meet says "Well that's an interesting accent- it's not American, right?" Just about no one here has heard of Calgary, but they seem to really like Canadians. They also really like Margaret Atwood, which I hope makes some of you (you know who you are) feel unpatriotic.
I got the chance to perform at the grad student's poetry night thing, which actually went really well. I was expecting it to be Calgary-poetry-reading sized, basically the poets and their friends, but it actually turned out the entire department showed up. It was a wee bit intimidating. But I had a couple drinks and met some really interesting people, very down to earth and un-pretentious for poets. Also almost entirely male and gay- I got more complements on my boots than I did on my poetry- not to sure how I feel about that.
I've also found the women's group on campus and am completely in love with them. They're not at all cliquely like the U of C one was, it's a very friendly atmosphere and I'm already in the thick of their pro-choice campaign. They also have a great book collection which includes many of my books I had to leave behind, so it was good to see them again.
I currently have an insane number of books checked out from the University and Public library to fill my alarmingly empty bookshelf. I've done a lot of reading- you'd be surprised how much reading time being unemployed and having your partner overseas leaves you with. I'm currently reading One Hundred Years of Solitude, which has been on my reading list forever. So good- and so not in my area of study- but five years as an English student has trained me to believe any sort of reading is actually studying, kinda, sorta.
How was everyone's Thanksgiving weekend? You don't know how lucky you are to live in a colony- us colonizers don't get a Thanksgiving at all.
British kisses!

Oh right, I'm going to school here!

2005-10-08T00:18:00.000+01:00

Hello all. I've had the first of both my classes and have had a rather jolting reminder that I'm here to do a very intensive degree that I should really start working on. All this time spent wandering around in a tourist-y daze is going to have to be replaced with reading. So much reading. My first course, Culture and Intellect in the 19th c., seems really exactly how the course name sounds. My professor has been around long enough to know Raymond Williams, if that means anything to anyone. He's old, and judging by the reading list he's a big fan of the dead white guys. He's going to make me read an entire Matthew Arnold book :( But he seems fairly open to different paper topics, so hopefully something interesting will come of it. My second class I took almost exclusively because I thought the name was so interesting: "On (Not) Being Able to Write." Basically, it's about looking at the drive to write from a psychoanalytic perspective- the class does seem interesting and I really like the professor- but the reading is also challenging and I have no idea what to write a paper on for that class.
Anyway, now that I've bored you all I can talk about the birds here- the seagulls and pigeons practically run the city. They're gigantic creatures that will not move out of your way, and I'm convinced if you tried to physically move them they would bite your hand off. It was one of the more entertaining moments of my life when my professor had to interrupt his lecture because the seagull watching him through the skylight was quote "freaking him out."
I got to watch some British TV today thanks to a friendly fellow student who lives in a real house with a couch and TV and everything. Mostly the TV's pretty horrible, with the exception of this show called "Spoons" which reminds of Kids in the Hall. Otherwise we were forced to watch such atrocities as Gene Simmons (the guy from Kiss- is that his name?) teach some bewildered British school kids how to be rock stars.
I have discovered the secret to cheap food here is potatoes, english muffins, yoghurt and cereal. It's kept me happy so far, though I am unsure about how to do anything with potatoes except mash them.
Ah, blogging is so fun. Who knew I was so interesting? Kidding, kidding...

A Canadian in Brighton

2005-10-02T19:21:00.000+01:00

Hello again. I have to say, blogging is a very effective way to procrastinate. There is never a bad time to blog, and then to read everyone else's blog.
I've had a bit of a chance to come out of my cocoon of self pity today and look around the city some more. I feel very un-trendy here, as the female stylish uniform seems to be mini skirts, weird ankle length tights and weirder boots. I'm not really too upset about that. I'm hoping to start a Canadian-%100 cotton-chic look. No takers yet. There also seems to be no agreement between drivers and pedestrians about rules of contact. Apparently pedestrians don't have the right of way here, but there's so many of them traffic just gets swamped and has to stop. Poor traffic-sign-obeying me will have to do some adjusting.
People are friendly here but blunter and not really polite. When you bump into someone or vise-versa, instead of making eye contact and apologizing, here you just pretend to other person doesn't exist.
It's definitely a change being a cultural minority. I've become self-conscious about my voice. You know how it seems British people have accents and Canadian/Americans are just flat? We're not- I now can tell we have an accent and it's nowhere as attractive as a British one. Fortunately, we make up for it with good teeth.
Things are also incredibly expensive here, more so than I was expecting. Looks like I'm going to have to get a job after all- fingers crossed for a one in a bookstore! Lots of good bookstores here, though not as many second hand ones.
There are also historical relics distributed through out the city which people use solely for landmarks. The only way you can find your way to and from my place is to head towards or away from the gigantic Clock Tower that sounds like an a apocalyptic warning signal every 6pm.
I also get to ride on a two decker bus- sitting at the top is bumpy and you can't really see what stop you're at, but is definitely more fun.
The food here is similar to Canada but with a proliferation of weird seafood, such as jellied eels and deep fried crabs. People eat them with "chips". Containers are all shaped differently, which leaves me with an odd nostalgia for Canadian shaped food containers.
I could go on forever- there's so much here that's different. But I'm slowly getting used to it and have started asking way more questions to strangers than my ego is comfortable with! Having a phone line and internet connection again just makes such a huge difference- nothing quite as fun to kill time with as the Internet. Anyway, drop me a line all you backwards Calgarians!

My very own internet connection

2005-09-30T21:43:00.000+01:00

Hello again everyone. I just had to post a new entry as I now have a functioning laptop and a internet connection in my room. It makes me so very happy. I have also signed on to MSN, my hotmail address is just jenniferburgess@hotmail.co.uk. I haven't tried it out yet, so if you're bored in the afternoon log on and talk to me, I'm bored in the evening.
I also have a phone number- hooray!- from Calgary you would dial 011 44 1273 719823. Oh, and for those of you who don't know, my address is:

12F
51-53 Kings Road
Brighton
BN1 1NA
UK

As you may have guessed, I'm desperate for communication from across the ocean. I had a good talk with my American and Canadian 'flatmates' today and it turns out they're going through the same bewildered feelings I am, so that felt good to have other people share my feelings of loneliness. Aren't human beings weird that way?

I met the other students in my program yesterday and they thankfully all seem great. I'm the youngest of the bunch by probably a decade, which is good because I'm more familiar with contemporary developments but also bad because professors tend to associate more with older students. Hmmm... Anyway, I'm looking forward to starting classes next week. I have a bus pass and everything. The University reminds me a bit of U of C, which is kind of comforting. At the very least, I can always find my way around a University.
Now I just have to do something about my room. I have never stayed in a residence before, and therefore am a little taken aback by the starkness and bad paint job. I should have brought some posters.

Anything new or exciting in Calgary?

Here's a picture taken by someone else of my residence. The ocean's right on front of the building (in fact, the photographer must have been standing in it)

I'm finally here!

2005-09-29T12:30:00.000+01:00

Hi everyone. Well, I made it here in one piece, pretty much. The flight was long and uncomfortable, but totally safe. Getting through customs was disappointingly easy (I was expecting more of an interrogation). Leaving the airport was the problem because no one could find my luggage and I ended up having to sit in a cargo depot for five and a half hours. I got to my residence feeling tired and discovered I didn't have a phone or email access. So then I felt tired and isolated. But things are better today- I've unpacked a lot and made my way up to the University where they have- thank god- computers with internet.
Brighton is beautiful. Totally different than Canada, I think a lot of my feelings of anxiety are just due to culture shock. Everything is just strange enough to make you feel out of place. And the city is set up like a maze with no street signs, and as most of you know I'm a little directionally challenged. But I'll get used to it eventually.
It's amazing living in a city so old. Studying British literature and then moving to Britain makes you feel like you're always walking around in a novel. Very surreal- that would be the word to describe my entire trip do far.
Pictures to come soon, as soon as I can find a scanner.
I'm in the process of getting a landline, so those of you with phone plans can call me.
In the end, I'm overwhelmed but excited to be here. I miss you all and wish I could have taken you with me- new adventures are more fun with friends.
Cheers! (as they say)

Last Canadian Weekend!

2005-09-24T18:03:00.000+01:00

Well, it's T -4 days and counting. Who knew I was going to miss you guys so much? I think if I have to say goodbye to one more person I'm going to turn into a puddle. Seriously.
I'm actually looking forward to the plane ride because I will have 10 hours in which I will not have to do anything. I can just sit still and listen to my new iPod, which has recently been dressed up in flower stickers for the occasion. Moving countries is way to much work. Most of you probably know this already- I did not. I dream about having to fill out endless forms. Noooooo....
In preparation I'm watching lots of Monty Python and Hugh Grant movies. The last few weeks have given me time to practice looking nonchalant and graceful in gross rainy weather. Also a practical skill.
I'm excited to compare Britain to Canada. It will be an interesting cultural study. I am also excited about being a real pub, not an imitation pub (sorry fellow Canadians, but really, it's true).
I will also continue to fiddle with blogger, so eventually this blog will look more interesting and someday the links might even work properly.
Cheerio!

sigh

2005-09-17T02:43:00.000+01:00

Well, it's 7:47 and no one is at my party. This means either:
- you have all died in a freaky accident, especially you punctual ones
- you are trapped under a large piece of furniture
- it is actually Saturday (this has happened before- days mysteriously switching on me)
- you have discovered I am not that cool. This is not a good excuse because you all knew that already.
If it is any of the first three reasons I suppose I could forgive you.
Good luck with the heavy furniture thing.
I'm going to eat all my homemade appetizers in 10 minutes. And counting.

Nothing like a good mocking of Americans

2005-09-13T04:33:00.000+01:00

This has nothing to do with my trip, but is just really funny:

http://www.mcsweeneys.net/links/lists/10JamesErwin.html

I've got a lot of quality internet surfing done today. I think it had to do with all the low quality pot my neighbours are smoking.

Getting nervous....

2005-09-06T20:47:00.000+01:00

So I actually have my Visa, passport and plane ticket on front of me. It appears I am actually going. I don't think it's really sunk in yet- this felt much easier when I decided I was going a year ago. But all this packing, saying goodbye... I feel like I'm either living the beginning or the end of a novel. Let's hope for the former.

Yay! A blog!

2005-08-28T05:01:00.000+01:00

Hello all. Welcome to Jen's brand new blog. For those wondering, I'm not leaving until Sept 27, so drop me a line.
I'm still figuring this crazy blog stuff out, so stay posted!